{"id":47295,"date":"2024-03-12T13:24:37","date_gmt":"2024-03-12T12:24:37","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=47295"},"modified":"2024-03-12T13:24:37","modified_gmt":"2024-03-12T12:24:37","slug":"toppen-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=47295","title":{"rendered":"Toppen"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"brown
Photo by Tyler Lastovich on Pexels.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

L\u00e5g idag. Det blir inte s\u00e5 mycket. Ingen som helst \u00f6nskan att kl\u00e4ttra upp p\u00e5 den d\u00e4r bergstoppen. Skulle v\u00e4l helst l\u00e4ggs mig i soffan med god bok. Men n\u00e5gon ordning f\u00e5r det nu \u00e4nd\u00e5 vara. Ocks\u00e5 jag har \u00e4nd\u00e5 lite stolthet kvar.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Borde b\u00e4ra in en pall pellets. Men det k\u00e4nns inte s\u00e5d\u00e4r j\u00e4ttelockande det heller. Men kanske kan det d\u00e4r \u00e4ndra p\u00e5 sig efter en kopp kaffe. Om inte kan man f\u00f6rs\u00f6ka med tv\u00e5 koppar. B\u00e4ra in p\u00e5 darr. Kaffedrarr.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Pratar med en gammal god v\u00e4n p\u00e5 telefon, v\u00e4n fr\u00e5n f\u00f6rr, p\u00e5 lunchen. Blir positivt \u00f6verraskad av samtalet, det var l\u00e4nge sedan vi pratade. Allt \u00e4r som f\u00f6rut. Det \u00e4r bara tid som g\u00e5tt. Heder \u00e5t dem som ringer och minns mig. Sj\u00e4lv minns jag men \u00e4r f\u00f6r feg f\u00f6r att \u00e5terknyta kontakter. Har alltid varit s\u00e5 j\u00e4vla feg. Bara n\u00e4ra-d\u00f6den-upplevelser kan f\u00e5 mig att fatta mod. Ja och eftersom dessa intr\u00e4ffar relativt s\u00e4llan f\u00e5r man sk\u00e4mmas det mesta av tiden d\u00e4remellan.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

ARM har skickat ett paket med utvecklargodis. N\u00e5gonstans m\u00e5ste dom v\u00e4l l\u00e4gga alla pengar som str\u00f6mmar in. Men jag tar g\u00e4rna emot. Fast jag var ner och h\u00e4mtade ett annat paket f\u00f6r n\u00e5gon timme sedan. N\u00e5gon m\u00e5tta f\u00e5r det \u00e4nd\u00e5 vara p\u00e5 paketh\u00e4mtandet under en och samma dag. S\u00e5 det f\u00e5r ligga kvar. I alla fall till imorgon. Eller till n\u00e4sta dag. Gratis m\u00e5 vara gott men br\u00e5dskar inte.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Inne i sl\u00f6hetens dimma tittar jag p\u00e5 en film om hur Gessles Mazarin spelas in. Det d\u00e4r med att ha m\u00e4nniskor omkring sig som hj\u00e4lper till av egen fri vilja blir jag s\u00e5 oerh\u00f6rt avundsjuk p\u00e5. Till och men hans unge son och fru appl\u00e5derar de nya l\u00e5tarna p\u00e5 n\u00e5got st\u00e4lle i filmen. Jag har alltid varit n\u00e5gon slags Don Quijote fast utan vapendragare. Ser allts\u00e5 v\u00e4derkvarnar \u00f6verallt. Det \u00e4r antagligen det jag h\u00e5ller p\u00e5 med nu och h\u00e4r ocks\u00e5. Det \u00e4r lite l\u00f6je \u00f6ver alltsammans och jag \u00e4r den l\u00f6jlige som alltid st\u00e5r l\u00e4ngst fram.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

N\u00e5ja, det \u00e4r som det \u00e4r med allt s\u00e5dant d\u00e4r. Man f\u00f6rtj\u00e4nar och man f\u00f6rtj\u00e4nar inte. En f\u00f6rdel med att jobba sj\u00e4lv \u00e4r \u00e4nd\u00e5 att man har n\u00e5gon slags obegr\u00e4nsad frihet ocks\u00e5. Det och kontroll. \u00c4lskar b\u00e5da mer \u00e4n mitt eget liv.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Man kanske skall ge sig ut och b\u00e4ra in den d\u00e4r pallen med pellets \u00e4nd\u00e5. Solen skiner \u00e4nd\u00e5 d\u00e4r ute. Allts\u00e5 \u00e4r det en utm\u00e4rkt urs\u00e4kt f\u00f6r att med gott samvete befinna sig ute i solen. Jag m\u00e5 vara skyldig till allt men har ocks\u00e5 urs\u00e4kter att ta till f\u00f6r det mesta.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

L\u00e5g idag. Det blir inte s\u00e5 mycket. Ingen som helst \u00f6nskan att kl\u00e4ttra upp p\u00e5 den d\u00e4r bergstoppen. Skulle v\u00e4l helst l\u00e4ggs mig i soffan med god bok. Men n\u00e5gon ordning f\u00e5r det nu \u00e4nd\u00e5 vara. Ocks\u00e5 jag har \u00e4nd\u00e5 lite stolthet kvar. Borde b\u00e4ra in en pall pellets. Men det k\u00e4nns inte s\u00e5d\u00e4r j\u00e4ttelockande […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-47295","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":29564,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=29564","url_meta":{"origin":47295,"position":0},"title":"En bra dag","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2018-08-15","format":false,"excerpt":"En s\u00e5dan d\u00e4r bra dag. N\u00e4r tjugo sekunder drygt blir till under 2 ms. Det kan v\u00e4l kallas god optimering. Eller kanske kallas det bara en bugg. Det beror p\u00e5 hum\u00f6r. Ja och sj\u00e4lvf\u00f6rtroende. Men jag t\u00e4nker inte tr\u00f6tta er med detaljer. Det blev bra. Ni f\u00e5r n\u00f6ja er med\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/IMG_20180813_083037999_HDR.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/IMG_20180813_083037999_HDR.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/IMG_20180813_083037999_HDR.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/IMG_20180813_083037999_HDR.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/IMG_20180813_083037999_HDR.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/IMG_20180813_083037999_HDR.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":20252,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=20252","url_meta":{"origin":47295,"position":1},"title":"Idiot!","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2016-04-28","format":false,"excerpt":"Torsdag. 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