{"id":39125,"date":"2021-06-11T07:13:34","date_gmt":"2021-06-11T06:13:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=39125"},"modified":"2021-06-11T07:13:34","modified_gmt":"2021-06-11T06:13:34","slug":"sommaroppet-pa-kullen","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=39125","title":{"rendered":"Sommar\u00f6ppet p\u00e5 kullen"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Jag g\u00e5r runt huset och \u00f6ppnar alla d\u00f6rrar. Sommar\u00f6ppet p\u00e5 kullen. Ett speciellt privilegie det d\u00e4r morgon\u00f6ppnandet som sker med fortfarande k\u00e4nsliga barfotaf\u00f6tter i det av morgondagg fuktiga gr\u00e4set. Men en present till en k\u00e4llare som inte f\u00e5r k\u00e4nna av mycket av vindar under andra \u00e5rstider \u00e4r ett lagom korsdrag genom ett \u00e5ldrande hus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sommar. S\u00e5 j\u00e4kla underbart.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P\u00e5 kontoret \u00f6ppnar jag tv\u00e5 av de stora f\u00f6nstren. In med f\u00e5gels\u00e5ngen. Stannar upp en stund och lyssnar. In ocks\u00e5 med den friska luften. Kanske kan den l\u00e4ka en gubbe i snabbt f\u00f6rfall.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sen s\u00e4tter jag p\u00e5 kaffe. Det \u00e4r \u00e4nd\u00e5 fredag. Man f\u00e5r unna sig.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lyssnar lite mer p\u00e5 f\u00e5gels\u00e5ngen<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Stryker lite med handen \u00f6ver Frasse p\u00e5 utskriften av honom som ligger h\u00e4r p\u00e5 bordet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

F\u00e5r en klump i halsen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fast bra s\u00e5klart i alla annat. D\u00f6den \u00e4r alltid n\u00e4rvarande. Man kan inte gr\u00e4va ner sig i ner genom de l\u00e4ttgr\u00e4vda lageren av skit. Ta sig hela v\u00e4gen ner i sorgens m\u00f6rker. M\u00e5ste leva. Ja och h\u00e4r vill jag vara. Just nu. Kan en m\u00e4nniska \u00f6nska sig mer? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00c4r det inte fantastiskt att man k\u00e4nner s\u00e5? Att man f\u00e5r k\u00e4nna s\u00e5?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

M\u00e5ste flina lite. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tur att ingen ser mig.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

S\u00e4ger nej till en till intervju. Har varit duktig p\u00e5 det under de senaste \u00e5ren. Att finnas trots att man inte syns. Att njuta av det. Solit\u00e4rens liv.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bravo gubbe<\/strong>!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

N\u00e4r man b\u00f6rjar adressera sig sj\u00e4lv i tredje person med sina tankar s\u00e5 har man antagligen passerat en gr\u00e4ns. V\u00e4gen vidare i den riktningen \u00e4r att man uttalar allt det d\u00e4r h\u00f6gt. En slags slutstation. \u00c5tminstone stationen innan.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men f\u00e5gels\u00e5ngen. Den tar sig med l\u00e4tthet in i en genom \u00f6ppna f\u00f6nster precis som dess kamrat de varma sommarvindarna. Omsluter mig. Mildrar och l\u00e4ker det som g\u00f6r ont.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

De sista dagarna har det konvergerat. Listorna med “att-g\u00f6ra” har inte fyllts p\u00e5 som tidigare. Kanske \u00e4r jag \u00e4ntligen p\u00e5 v\u00e4g mot “klart”. D\u00e4r, i de fem bokst\u00e4verna vilar en befrielse. Paradoxen \u00e4r att jag redan lever i en slags befrielse. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men andra “att g\u00f6ra” listor fylls s\u00e5klart p\u00e5 ist\u00e4llet. Man hinner inte allt. Sommaren har i alla njutning ocks\u00e5 m\u00e5nga m\u00e5sten. \u00c4nnu \u00e4r det l\u00e5ngt till h\u00f6stens befrielse fr\u00e5n allt s\u00e5dant. Men sommar… man \u00e4r s\u00e5klart mer \u00e4n villig att betala priset.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

En utkastare har st\u00e5tt p\u00e5 listorna h\u00e4r i m\u00e5nga, m\u00e5nga \u00e5r nu. S\u00e4kert mer \u00e4n tjugo. Allts\u00e5 inte en s\u00e5dan d\u00e4r biffig typ som st\u00e5r utanf\u00f6r de hotta st\u00e4llena p\u00e5 Stureplan. Nej en f\u00f6r vatten. Slang kopplas till den. Munstycke s\u00e4tts p\u00e5 slangen. Vattning av v\u00e4xter d\u00e4r ute g\u00e5r som en dans. Men gissar p\u00e5 att den st\u00e5r kvar d\u00e4r p\u00e5 listan n\u00e4sta \u00e5r ocks\u00e5.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men s\u00e5dant d\u00e4r \u00e4r inte viktigt. Materia i f\u00f6rfall. Det mesta av det d\u00e4r \u00e4r bara en h\u00f6g med skrot p\u00e5 hundra \u00e5r. Entropin vinner. D\u00e4rf\u00f6r att den \u00e4r sj\u00e4lva j\u00e4mvikten. Den enda v\u00e4gen. F\u00f6r allt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ordning \u00e4r som ett fotografi. Kort. Onaturligt. Overkligt. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men dags att b\u00f6rja med dagens l\u00e5tsasv\u00e4rv. Backuper f\u00f6rst. Sen n\u00e5gra PR’s. Sen till sj\u00e4lva saken. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

H\u00f6jer min kaffemugg till munnen och tar en lagom stor klunk. L\u00e5ter fredagen starta.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u00c4r jag tr\u00f6tt p\u00e5 m\u00e4nniskorna eller \u00e4lskar jag m\u00e4nniskorna?<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Jag g\u00e5r runt huset och \u00f6ppnar alla d\u00f6rrar. Sommar\u00f6ppet p\u00e5 kullen. Ett speciellt privilegie det d\u00e4r morgon\u00f6ppnandet som sker med fortfarande k\u00e4nsliga barfotaf\u00f6tter i det av morgondagg fuktiga gr\u00e4set. Men en present till en k\u00e4llare som inte f\u00e5r k\u00e4nna av mycket av vindar under andra \u00e5rstider \u00e4r ett lagom korsdrag genom ett \u00e5ldrande hus. Sommar. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-39125","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":12485,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=12485","url_meta":{"origin":39125,"position":0},"title":"Vinter och sol p\u00e5kullen","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2014-03-16","format":false,"excerpt":"Trettiofyra grader visare termometern p\u00e5 kontoret n\u00e4r jag kommer ner. Stora skolf\u00f6nster skapar v\u00e4xthuseffekt h\u00e4r nere, men om sanningen skall fram s\u00e5 sitter termometern ocks\u00e5 i solen. Man kan bara g\u00f6ra en sak. \u00d6ppna f\u00f6nstret och f\u00e5 in allt det d\u00e4r soliga utifr\u00e5n in i sina lokaler. Eller g\u00e5 ut.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"images","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/02\/images1.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":18952,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=18952","url_meta":{"origin":39125,"position":1},"title":"WOW!","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2015-11-06","format":false,"excerpt":"Jag s\u00e4ger bara WOW. Dubbel WOW. Klassiskt. Och jag har bara hunnit till postf\u00f6rpackningen. F\u00f6rst det handskrivna p\u00e5 posten. K s\u00e4ger \"Du har f\u00e5tt ett privat brev\". \"VA!?\" s\u00e4ger jag. Det f\u00e5r man liksom aldrig. Nuf\u00f6rtiden. Skattemyndighet och reklam. Jag kikar ju s\u00e5klart. Fyrkantigt. Anar musik. CD. De kommer ibland\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "pod"","block_context":{"text":"pod","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=52"},"img":{"alt_text":"IMG_1591","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/IMG_1591-1024x768.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/IMG_1591-1024x768.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/IMG_1591-1024x768.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":11124,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=11124","url_meta":{"origin":39125,"position":2},"title":"Det alldagliga","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2013-11-21","format":false,"excerpt":"Jag bor i ett f\u00f6rbaskat stort gult hus p\u00e5 en kulle i Los. Ett hus som har sett sina b\u00e4sta dagar kanske, ett hus som i princip saknar ekonomiskt v\u00e4rde. 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En banan till uppfinnaren sj\u00e4lv som inte syns i bild. Jag \u00e4r f\u00f6rsiktig med ordet \"uppfinnare\". Det \u00e4r alldeles f\u00f6r fint. Kr\u00e4ver respekt. Men skapar man nytt s\u00e5 \u00e4r man v\u00e4l \"uppfinnare\". Det g\u00e5r inte komma ifr\u00e5n\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/IMG_20240430_084123-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/IMG_20240430_084123-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/IMG_20240430_084123-scaled.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/IMG_20240430_084123-scaled.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/IMG_20240430_084123-scaled.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/04\/IMG_20240430_084123-scaled.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p68PL2-ab3","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39125","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/24"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=39125"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39125\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":39127,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/39125\/revisions\/39127"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=39125"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=39125"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=39125"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}