{"id":3911,"date":"2013-03-10T22:17:00","date_gmt":"2013-03-10T21:17:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/?p=3911"},"modified":"2013-03-12T12:08:07","modified_gmt":"2013-03-12T11:08:07","slug":"sa-vaknar-jag-da-igen","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=3911","title":{"rendered":"S\u00e5 vaknar jag d\u00e5 igen"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/stj%C3%A4rna-1.jpg\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/stj%C3%A4rna-1.jpg?resize=320%2C231\" alt=\"stj\u00e4rna (1)\" width=\"320\" height=\"231\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-3914\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/stj%C3%A4rna-1.jpg?w=320&amp;ssl=1 320w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/03\/stj%C3%A4rna-1.jpg?resize=300%2C216&amp;ssl=1 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 320px) 100vw, 320px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Jag vaknade i natt. Jag g\u00f6r det. Klockan \u00e4r strax efter tv\u00e5. Alla sover. Jag \u00e4r ganska pigg. Det finns n\u00e5gra chips kvar i en p\u00e5se. Jag knycker en colaburk av sonen. Iskall. St\u00e4ller mig i \u00f6sterf\u00f6nstret. Dricker och \u00e4ter en hand chips. Fett fr\u00e5n chips i munnen n\u00e4r jag tuggat och svalt dom. \u00c4ckligt. Men chipsen var goda. Starka. Colan l\u00f6ser upp. Jag hickar. Kolsvart ute. Finns inget att se. Inte ens f\u00e5gelbordet syns. Inte ett sp\u00e5r av det bl\u00e5ljus som m\u00e5nen brukar skicka ut h\u00e4r mellan tr\u00e4den. Det jag \u00e4lskar. M\u00e5ste se varje vinter. Men inte nu. Bara svart. Men kanske d\u00e4r mellan tr\u00e4den en stj\u00e4rna. Ja, det \u00e4r det. N\u00e4r jag hittat en s\u00e5 ser jag fler. Jag \u00e4r inte ensam d\u00e4r i natten \u00e4nd\u00e5. Det k\u00e4nns b\u00e4ttre. Termometern s\u00e4ger minus femton. K\u00e4nner det fr\u00e5n f\u00f6nstret. Jag \u00e4r n\u00e4stan naken och huset \u00e4r gammalt. Gamla hus har f\u00f6nster som sl\u00e4pper in det utanf\u00f6r eller sl\u00e4pper ut det innanf\u00f6r. Det \u00e4r olika p\u00e5 dagar. Dom deltar mer aktivt i v\u00e4derl\u00e4get. \u00c4r inga kalla effektiva hermetiskt tillslutna avsk\u00e4rmade system. Lever. Jag gillar det. Colan kyler ocks\u00e5. Jag huttrar. Men st\u00e5r kvar.  Jag har ingen br\u00e5dska.<\/p>\n<p>Los h\u00e4r utanf\u00f6r kan jag hata ibland. \u00d6nska mig s\u00e5 l\u00e5ngt bort h\u00e4rifr\u00e5n som m\u00f6jligt. Men \u00e4lska st\u00e4llet desto mer andra g\u00e5nger. I tidningen idag s\u00e5 presenterade man en unders\u00f6kning d\u00e4r man konstaterar att m\u00e4nniskor \u00e4r lyckligare i st\u00e4derna. Jag undrar det jag. H\u00e4r st\u00e5r jag och \u00e4r arbetsl\u00f6s och misslyckad och k\u00e4nner mig \u00e4nd\u00e5 lycklig som fan. Tar en till klunk Cola p\u00e5 det. Ja en annan unders\u00f6kning konstaterade ju h\u00e4r f\u00f6rleden att optimism och lycka \u00e4r sjukliga tillst\u00e5nd. S\u00e5 Egentligen kanske det inte \u00e4r n\u00e5got att gl\u00e4djas \u00e5t \u00e4nd\u00e5. Men det \u00e4r klart. Professorer, doktorer och &#8220;unders\u00f6kare&#8221; \u00e4r n\u00e4stan aldrig speciellt mycket klockare \u00e4n oss andra. Det \u00e4r b\u00e4st om man drar sina slutsatser sj\u00e4lv. Jag tror vi \u00e4r lyckligare p\u00e5 landet. Inte rikare, bara mer tillfreds. Jag vet ocks\u00e5 att m\u00e4nniskorna i st\u00e4derna l\u00e4ngtar efter det h\u00e4r. Inte alla men m\u00e5nga. Om dom kunde f\u00e5 ihop livspusslet. Kunde g\u00f6ra sin karri\u00e4r, tj\u00e4na pengarna, shoppa upp dom igen.  Bo i ett hus som \u00e4r betalt och klart. D\u00e4r man klarar sig p\u00e5 en l\u00f6n. D\u00e4r man \u00e4r fri. Ja, friare i alla fall.<\/p>\n<p>Men skitsamma. Dom f\u00e5r l\u00f6sa sitt livspussel s\u00e5 g\u00f6r jag s\u00e5 gott jag kan med mitt.  Tassar in och l\u00e4gger mig igen. Frugan snarkar. Katterna snarkar. Snart g\u00f6r jag det ocks\u00e5.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Jag vaknade i natt. Jag g\u00f6r det. Klockan \u00e4r strax efter tv\u00e5. Alla sover. Jag \u00e4r ganska pigg. Det finns n\u00e5gra chips kvar i en p\u00e5se. Jag knycker en colaburk av sonen. Iskall. St\u00e4ller mig i \u00f6sterf\u00f6nstret. Dricker och \u00e4ter en hand chips. Fett fr\u00e5n chips i munnen n\u00e4r jag tuggat och svalt dom. \u00c4ckligt. [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[24,2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3911","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser","category-swedish"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1684,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=1684","url_meta":{"origin":3911,"position":0},"title":"S\u00f6ndagsmorgon","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2012-09-30","format":false,"excerpt":"Vaknar min vana trogen halv fyra p\u00e5 s\u00f6ndagsmorgonen. Det finns lite Coca Cola kvar i kylen s\u00e5 jag h\u00e4ller upp ett glas och st\u00e4ller mig framf\u00f6r \"mitt f\u00f6nster\" och dricker. \"Mitt f\u00f6nster\" ligger i v\u00e5rt k\u00f6k och v\u00e4tter mot \u00f6ster d\u00e4r det bara finns djur den h\u00e4r tiden p\u00e5 dygnet,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Betraktelser &amp; Ber\u00e4ttelse&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser &amp; Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1781,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=1781","url_meta":{"origin":3911,"position":1},"title":"Bl\u00e5ljus","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2012-10-28","format":false,"excerpt":"Halv fyra S\u00f6ndagsmorgon. Ja, egentligen halv tre eftersom h\u00e4r har inga klockor st\u00e4llts tillbaks vi den tiden. Mitt vanliga f\u00f6nster mot \u00f6ster. N\u00e5gra kex i n\u00e4ven. F\u00f6nstret som v\u00e4tter ut mot skogen och ingenting. Eller snarare mot det liv vi inte ser. \u00d6sterut. M\u00e5ste st\u00e5 d\u00e4r en stund. F\u00e5 n\u00e5gon\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Betraktelser &amp; Ber\u00e4ttelse&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser &amp; Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2155,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=2155","url_meta":{"origin":3911,"position":2},"title":"o-ljuset","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2012-11-29","format":false,"excerpt":"Den bryter igenom molnen, fullm\u00e5nen strax innan tolv. Jag vandrar runt med tandborsten i munnen p\u00e5 v\u00e4g till s\u00e4ngen och boken. Jag st\u00e4ller mig framf\u00f6r f\u00f6nstret. F\u00f6nstret som vetter ut mot skogen och ingenting. Eller snarare mot det liv vi inte ser. \u00d6sterut. M\u00e5ste st\u00e5 d\u00e4r en stund. Fullm\u00e5ne och\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Betraktelser &amp; Ber\u00e4ttelse&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser &amp; Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":7408,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=7408","url_meta":{"origin":3911,"position":3},"title":"&#8220;B\u00e4sta byn&#8221; fr\u00e5gar @P4Gavleborg","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2013-05-23","format":false,"excerpt":"\"B\u00e4sta byn\" fr\u00e5gar P4 G\u00e4vleborg efter. S\u00e5 bor man d\u00e5 i Lo(o)s. Man m\u00e5ste fundera lite. V\u00e4ster ut liksom. G\u00e4vle - Bolln\u00e4s - Edsbyn - Voxna... ja, sen \u00e4r det bara skog och efter ett tags f\u00e4rd d\u00e5 s\u00e5 kommer man fram till Lo(o)s. 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Jag vandrar runt som en sjukhusinlagd men frig\u00e5ende man. En timme. Lyssnar. Funderar. Njuter av v\u00e4dret. Pratar in p\u00e5 telefonen. Jag sitter i Boulognerskogen. Det \u00e4r dan efter midsommar. L\u00f6rdag. Det \u00e4r massor med m\u00e4nniskor ute. Ett par g\u00e5r in p\u00e5 fiket h\u00e4r i Boulognerskogen. Hand i\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Betraktelser &amp; Ber\u00e4ttelse&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser &amp; Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/IMG_20190624_141932907.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/IMG_20190624_141932907.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/IMG_20190624_141932907.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/IMG_20190624_141932907.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/IMG_20190624_141932907.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/07\/IMG_20190624_141932907.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":21322,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=21322","url_meta":{"origin":3911,"position":5},"title":"L\u00f6ningshelg","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2016-08-26","format":false,"excerpt":"Fredag. 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Vi som \u00e4r vegetarianer vill ocks\u00e5 g\u00e4rna ha lite mer utbud av vegetariska varor att v\u00e4lja mellan.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Betraktelser &amp; Ber\u00e4ttelse&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser &amp; Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"DSC00361-e1448011237408","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/DSC00361-e1448011237408.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/DSC00361-e1448011237408.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/DSC00361-e1448011237408.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/DSC00361-e1448011237408.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p68PL2-115","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3911","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/24"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3911"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3911\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3996,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3911\/revisions\/3996"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3911"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3911"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3911"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}