{"id":38852,"date":"2021-05-19T07:10:07","date_gmt":"2021-05-19T06:10:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=38852"},"modified":"2021-05-19T07:10:07","modified_gmt":"2021-05-19T06:10:07","slug":"ja-eller-nej-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=38852","title":{"rendered":"Ja eller Nej"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"people
Photo by PNW Production on Pexels.com<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Jag st\u00e4ller mig sj\u00e4lv ofta den d\u00e4r fr\u00e5gan s\u00e5h\u00e4r strax innan klockan sex p\u00e5 morgonen. \u00c4r det det h\u00e4r jag vill g\u00f6ra<\/em>? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hittills har jag alltid svarat ja. Tvekat kanske n\u00e5gra g\u00e5nger. Priset k\u00e4nns h\u00f6gt ibland fast det utifr\u00e5n s\u00e5klart ser ut som en joyride. Men “ja” till slut allts\u00e5. \u00c4r jag borta h\u00e4rifr\u00e5n l\u00e5tsaskontoret n\u00e5gra dagar s\u00e5 \u00e4r det med ett leende och den godaste av k\u00e4nslor jag betr\u00e4der de h\u00e4r lokalerna igen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jovisst, jag gillar m\u00e4nniskor. Skulle vilja tr\u00e4ffa och umg\u00e5s mer och med fler. Nyfiken p\u00e5 m\u00e4nniskosl\u00e4ktet och dess komplexitet helt enkelt. Men det solit\u00e4ra \u00e4r s\u00e5klart ett val. Man m\u00e5ste jobba m\u00e5nga timmar om man vill f\u00e5 n\u00e5got gjort. Det finns inget annat s\u00e4tt. Man kan inte sitta och titta p\u00e5 tv och tro att saker l\u00f6ser sig av sig sj\u00e4lva. De g\u00f6r de aldrig. S\u00e5 ensamhet, ja, ett pris att betala.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Resa skulle jag s\u00e5klart ocks\u00e5 vilja g\u00f6ra mycket mer. Men d\u00e4r handlar det bara om pengar. De g\u00e5r att skaffa. Och som sagt n\u00e4r jag kommer hem ler jag med hela ansiktet n\u00e4r jag f\u00e5r s\u00e4tta ig\u00e5ng h\u00e4r igen. Det fina med att resa bort \u00e4r ju just att komma hem igen. Ja och minnena fr\u00e5n resan som man kan leva l\u00e4nge p\u00e5.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Musik ocks\u00e5 s\u00e5klart. Ville kunna l\u00e4gga mer tid d\u00e4r. Men r\u00e4knar med att kunna det. Lite mer i alla fall. Snart.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Skriva d\u00e5? Ja det g\u00f6r jag ju. Jag har min blogg. Men kanske lite mer. De d\u00e4r novellerna f\u00f6r byr\u00e5l\u00e5dan, ja, bloggen i det h\u00e4r fallet d\u00e5? Nog borde dom v\u00e4l skrivas innan man d\u00f6r? Kanske…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men ja<\/em> \u00e4r allts\u00e5 svaret. Det \u00e4r det h\u00e4r jag vill g\u00f6ra. Den dag det inte \u00e4r det. Ja d\u00e5 handlar vi efter det.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ser att en gammal kamrat plockar ut en dryg halv miljon i aktieutdelning. I \u00e5r igen. Han har passera medel\u00e5ldern. det b\u00f6rjar bli dags att dra ner. R\u00e4tt s\u00e5klart. Men jag vet ocks\u00e5 att han inte blir ett dugg lyckligare av de d\u00e4r pengarna. Han skulle ju kunna ha mer. Ja och har v\u00e4l det ocks\u00e5. Men inte ens det r\u00e4cker. Ni vet , den fattige saknar mycket, den girige saknar allt.<\/em> B\u00e4ttre att de d\u00e4r pengarna hamnat hos n\u00e5gon som br\u00e4nde dom p\u00e5 dr\u00f6mmarna och sen \u00e5kte till en \u00f6 i s\u00f6derhavet och hittade den han egentligen var. Den h\u00e4r mannen kommer bara ha dom p\u00e5 ett konto, ett som skall v\u00e4xa, och som aldrig har ett saldo som g\u00f6r honom n\u00f6jd. \u00c4r det det h\u00e4r jag vill<\/em>? Jag hoppas han svarar ja p\u00e5 den fr\u00e5gan. D\u00e5 \u00e4r ju allt som det skall s\u00e5klart.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fast alla g\u00f6r som dom vill. Viktigt d\u00e4r. Man kan tycka om andras liv men veta, nope, det g\u00f6r man inte. S\u00e5 man borde s\u00e5klart l\u00e5ta bli at tycka ocks\u00e5. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jag gillar Stockholm. Sagt till dom som tror att mitt prat ig\u00e5r om Storstads\u00f6versitteri \u00e4r det vanliga gelsbygdsgn\u00e4llet om 08-or. Men jag tro vi \u00e4r detsamma. Vi m\u00e4nniskor allts\u00e5. Att Afrikaner vet b\u00e4st vad Afrika beh\u00f6ver. Ja och Losbor eller G\u00e4vlebor allts\u00e5 vad Los och G\u00e4vle beh\u00f6ver. Det \u00e4r n\u00e4r man tror man sitter \u00f6ver ist\u00e4llet f\u00f6r bredvid, och det framg\u00e5r, som man f\u00e5r en smocka fr\u00e5n mig.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I allt det \u00f6vriga tror jag stad och landsbygd beh\u00f6vs. Folk har olika \u00f6nskningar och krav. Och, nej, det \u00e4r ingen t\u00e4vling om vem som har det b\u00e4st. Det f\u00e5r man best\u00e4mma sj\u00e4lv och sen g\u00f6ra sina val utifr\u00e5n det.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mitt te b\u00f6rjar kallna h\u00e4r bredvid mig. Ute leker antagligen huggormarna i gr\u00e4smattan. K tycker jag pj\u00e5skar med det d\u00e4r. Men jag har lyft bort n\u00e5gra. Vill leva dom med. Jag ocks\u00e5 allts\u00e5. En stund till p\u00e5 jorden vill jag ha. Och var det ett \u00e5r kvar att leva s\u00e5 var det just det jag g\u00f6r h\u00e4r och nu som jag allts\u00e5 skulle g\u00f6ra.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Jag st\u00e4ller mig sj\u00e4lv ofta den d\u00e4r fr\u00e5gan s\u00e5h\u00e4r strax innan klockan sex p\u00e5 morgonen. \u00c4r det det h\u00e4r jag vill g\u00f6ra? Hittills har jag alltid svarat ja. Tvekat kanske n\u00e5gra g\u00e5nger. Priset k\u00e4nns h\u00f6gt ibland fast det utifr\u00e5n s\u00e5klart ser ut som en joyride. Men “ja” till slut allts\u00e5. \u00c4r jag borta h\u00e4rifr\u00e5n l\u00e5tsaskontoret […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-38852","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":27126,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=27126","url_meta":{"origin":38852,"position":0},"title":"Det \u00e4r gott","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2018-02-13","format":false,"excerpt":"Det \u00e4r gott. Jod\u00e5 det skulle s\u00e4kert kunnat vara p\u00e5 n\u00e5got annat s\u00e4tt. Men det \u00e4r som det \u00e4r. Gott eller el\u00e4ndigt kan man best\u00e4mma sj\u00e4lv. F\u00f6r det mesta. S\u00e5 jag best\u00e4mmer mig f\u00f6r gott. F\u00f6r att det k\u00e4nns s\u00e5. Sn\u00f6n singlar inte ned l\u00e4ngre.\u00a0 Det \u00e4r bra. M\u00e5ste ut\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/Screenshot-from-2018-02-13-10-14-23-1024x688.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/Screenshot-from-2018-02-13-10-14-23-1024x688.png?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/02\/Screenshot-from-2018-02-13-10-14-23-1024x688.png?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":33489,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=33489","url_meta":{"origin":38852,"position":1},"title":"Det finns ett slut","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2019-11-08","format":false,"excerpt":"Jod\u00e5, fredagen och d\u00e4rmed veckan, \u00e4r p\u00e5 v\u00e4g mot ett oundvikligt slut. Om ungef\u00e4r en timme skall ocks\u00e5 jag ge mig. Vandra iv\u00e4g fr\u00e5n det h\u00e4r l\u00e5tsaskontoret och alla dess l\u00e5tsasg\u00f6rom\u00e5l f\u00f6r lite vila. P\u00e5 s\u00f6ndag sitter jag h\u00e4r igen. Ja om allt g\u00e5r v\u00e4l. Dvs om man \u00f6verlever en\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/IMG_20191108_174741157_HDR.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/IMG_20191108_174741157_HDR.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/IMG_20191108_174741157_HDR.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/IMG_20191108_174741157_HDR.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/IMG_20191108_174741157_HDR.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/IMG_20191108_174741157_HDR.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":36891,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=36891","url_meta":{"origin":38852,"position":2},"title":"N\u00e4r jag g\u00e5r f\u00f6rbi","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2020-11-21","format":false,"excerpt":"Ute, fast inne \u00e4nd\u00e5, i det jag fortfarande kallar \"studion\", h\u00e4nger dom. Gitarrerna. Ost\u00e4mda. Oanv\u00e4nda. L\u00e4mnade. Ensamma. Ledsna. Rummet \u00e4r kallst\u00e4llt. H\u00e4r \u00e4r det inte ombonat. H\u00e4r hamnar allt som inte anv\u00e4nds. Jag ser dom varje kv\u00e4ll n\u00e4r jag g\u00e5r och l\u00e4gger mig. Det d\u00e4r suget i magen suger alltid\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/IMG_20201120_232818-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/IMG_20201120_232818-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/IMG_20201120_232818-scaled.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/IMG_20201120_232818-scaled.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/IMG_20201120_232818-scaled.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/IMG_20201120_232818-scaled.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":39610,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=39610","url_meta":{"origin":38852,"position":3},"title":"Dom?","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2021-08-17","format":false,"excerpt":"\"Jag skall nog visa dom\". Jo jag har nog sagt det till mig sj\u00e4lv sen tio\u00e5rs\u00e5ldern. M\u00e5nga g\u00e5nger. 64*365 ~23000 n\u00e5gonting borde det bli. Ja, l\u00e4gg till 10000 p\u00e5 det. Sv\u00e5ra dar har jag nog sagt eller t\u00e4nkt det d\u00e4r mer \u00e4n en g\u00e5ng p\u00e5 ett dygn. Nu s\u00e5h\u00e4r med\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210811_225118-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210811_225118-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210811_225118-scaled.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210811_225118-scaled.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210811_225118-scaled.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210811_225118-scaled.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":10234,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=10234","url_meta":{"origin":38852,"position":4},"title":"Ens dagar \u00e4ro r\u00e4knade","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2013-10-01","format":false,"excerpt":"Skulle man titta p\u00e5 sig sj\u00e4lv idag med unga \u00f6gon s\u00e5 skulle man v\u00e4l antagligen bara se ett misslyckande. Man ville bli popstj\u00e4rna - blev inte det, man ville bli framg\u00e5ngsrik forskare - blev inte det, osv, osv. \u00c4nd\u00e5 k\u00e4nner man sig konstigt nog n\u00f6jd idag n\u00e4r man sitter h\u00e4r\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"regn","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/regn.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/regn.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/regn.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/regn.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":33917,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=33917","url_meta":{"origin":38852,"position":5},"title":"Dan f\u00f6re dan","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2019-12-23","format":false,"excerpt":"Jag \u00e4r lite sp\u00e4nd s\u00e5h\u00e4r dan f\u00f6r dan. Varje \u00e5r. Men om man var pirrig som liten f\u00f6r att man kanske skulle f\u00e5 de d\u00e4r presenter som man \u00f6nskat sig s\u00e5 \u00e4r orsaken en helt annan nu som vuxen. Det \u00e4r s\u00e5 mycket som skall klaffa. Viktigast \u00e4r bilen. Brakar\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/burning_sun.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/burning_sun.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/burning_sun.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p68PL2-a6E","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/38852","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/24"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=38852"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/38852\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":38854,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/38852\/revisions\/38854"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=38852"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=38852"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=38852"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}