{"id":36757,"date":"2020-11-11T10:52:58","date_gmt":"2020-11-11T09:52:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=36757"},"modified":"2020-11-11T10:52:58","modified_gmt":"2020-11-11T09:52:58","slug":"dar-jag-sitter","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=36757","title":{"rendered":"D\u00e4r jag sitter"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
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Jag kommer hem efter en frostig promenad. En explosion med efterf\u00f6ljande tryckv\u00e5g n\u00e5gonstans ifr\u00e5n vid 10:11 f\u00e5r mig att undra om huset st\u00e5r kvar. Men det g\u00f6r det ju. L\u00e5tsaskontoret d\u00e4r nere. Nog \u00e4lskar jag det allt. Ja huset och kullen ocks\u00e5. Ingen os\u00e4kerhet d\u00e4r i den k\u00e4nslan. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jag kan inte h\u00e5lla mig fr\u00e5n att fotografera de d\u00e4r frostnupna d\u00e4r ute. Kameran har sv\u00e5rt med sk\u00e4rpan. Billiga grejer. Men jag kan \u00e4nd\u00e5 inte h\u00e5lla mig. Ibland blir det \u00e4nd\u00e5 skapligt. Sen att alla andra tar exakt samma bilder just nu spelar mindre roll. Jag tar bilder som jag aldrig n\u00e5gonsin tittar p\u00e5 igen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Men n\u00e4r jag tar upp kameran ur fickan s\u00e5 \u00e4r selfiekameran vald och jag ser farsan d\u00e4r p\u00e5 displayen. N\u00e4r man tr\u00e4ffar folk som k\u00e4nde honom brukar alla orera sig \u00f6ver hur lik honom jag har blivit. Har aldrig sett det sj\u00e4lv. Men folk forts\u00e4tter att p\u00e5st\u00e5 det. S\u00e5 jag tar en selfie. Det d\u00e4r skall unders\u00f6kas hemma.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men v\u00e4l hemma ser jag inga som helst likheten. Sk\u00e4ggstubben d\u00e5 kanske. Det kunde han ha ocks\u00e5 dagar n\u00e4r han bara var sj\u00e4lv bland maskiner och projekt. Men kanske \u00e4r det bara jag som inte minns hur han verkligen s\u00e5g ut. Lukten av honom n\u00e4r han kom hem fr\u00e5n Tr\u00e4f\u00f6r\u00e4dlingen den l\u00e4mnar mig d\u00e4remot aldrig. Jag tittar efter honom \u00e4n idag n\u00e4r jag k\u00e4nner den doften. Etanol och terpentin. Sp\u00e5nskivetillverkningens dofter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Konstaterar helt lugnt att livet \u00e4nd\u00e5 \u00e4r gott att leva n\u00e4r jag l\u00e5ser upp och g\u00e5r in p\u00e5 l\u00e5tsaskontoret f\u00f6r \u00e4nnu en dag h\u00e4r p\u00e5 kullen. Det r\u00e4cker l\u00e5ngt.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Jag kommer hem efter en frostig promenad. En explosion med efterf\u00f6ljande tryckv\u00e5g n\u00e5gonstans ifr\u00e5n vid 10:11 f\u00e5r mig att undra om huset st\u00e5r kvar. Men det g\u00f6r det ju. L\u00e5tsaskontoret d\u00e4r nere. Nog \u00e4lskar jag det allt. Ja huset och kullen ocks\u00e5. Ingen os\u00e4kerhet d\u00e4r i den k\u00e4nslan. Jag kan inte h\u00e5lla mig fr\u00e5n att […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-36757","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":20685,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=20685","url_meta":{"origin":36757,"position":0},"title":"Om det h\u00e4r \u00e4r en bra dag…","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2016-06-15","format":false,"excerpt":"Jod\u00e5, det fanns en tid n\u00e4r jag ville bli rockstj\u00e4rna. \"Se mig\" skrek allt inom mig. Ja och det fanns en tid n\u00e4r jag som den fysiker jag \u00e4r ville ha Nobelpris och bli ber\u00f6md f\u00f6r min g\u00e4rning. Som beviset p\u00e5 mitt v\u00e4rde. Bara det. 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Den som f\u00e5r upp undertecknad en timme tidigare \u00e4n normalt. Jag kommer p\u00e5 att jag till och med gl\u00f6mmer tekoppen, en sak som \u00e4r \u00e5tg\u00e4rdad nu. Tekopp full == bloggskrivande. Blogginl\u00e4ggens l\u00e4ngd avg\u00f6rs av volymen p\u00e5 koppen. Stor kopp idag. Minus \u00e5tta grader ute. Det bl\u00e5ser friskt. Men\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"Bjorkefink_0003","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/Bjorkefink_0003-1024x686.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/Bjorkefink_0003-1024x686.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/Bjorkefink_0003-1024x686.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":18201,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=18201","url_meta":{"origin":36757,"position":2},"title":"G\u00f6r klart!","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2015-06-30","format":false,"excerpt":"Tystnad h\u00e4r. Nej jag r\u00e4knar inte datorfl\u00e4ktars ljud l\u00e4ngre. 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Pannan, Hulken, brinner. Ja det brinner inuti den. B\u00e4st att klarg\u00f6ra det. B\u00e4ttre. Film har besk\u00e5das. Science fiction. Tillr\u00e4ckligt bra f\u00f6r att h\u00e5lla sig vaken d\u00e4r i gr\u00f6n IKEA soffa. Jod\u00e5 balanserande p\u00e5 gr\u00e4nsen. Men p\u00e5\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"2015-11-12_09-18-57","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/11\/2015-11-12_09-18-57.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":10902,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=10902","url_meta":{"origin":36757,"position":4},"title":"S\u00e4g det min v\u00e4n!","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2013-11-12","format":false,"excerpt":"S\u00e5ja. Tisdag. Det \u00e4r en bra dag. 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