{"id":36597,"date":"2020-10-29T15:52:02","date_gmt":"2020-10-29T14:52:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=36597"},"modified":"2020-10-29T15:52:02","modified_gmt":"2020-10-29T14:52:02","slug":"en-center-och-en-pase-halstabletter","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=36597","title":{"rendered":"En center och en p\u00e5se halstabletter"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Jag \u00e4ter inte godis under veckorna. S\u00e5 har det varit ganska l\u00e4nge. Oftast har det d\u00e4r bara blivit brutet n\u00e4r Backa-Jan d\u00f6k upp med en whiskyflaska och fem p\u00e5sar Vic’s bl\u00e5 och det d\u00e4r okynniga leendet som bara han hade. Busleendet<\/a>. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men idag. Det g\u00e5r inte leva vidare utan tillf\u00f6rt socker. Jag k\u00e4nner mig d\u00f6ven. Trollar med Alvedon och stor kopp kaffe. Men inser till slut att socker, japp, det \u00e4r det som beh\u00f6vs. S\u00e5 jag inhandlar. Center och en p\u00e5se Vic’s bl\u00e5. Tror s\u00e5klart jag tar en guldnougat. Standardvalet. Jag tror ofta s\u00e5dana saker. Kommer ofta hem med annat \u00e4n “jag handlat”. Man b\u00f6r n\u00e4mligen kontrollera vad handen verkligen tar ocks\u00e5 har jag m\u00e4rkt. Inte bara utse varan som skall plockas och l\u00e5ta handen sk\u00f6ta det d\u00e4r plockandet sj\u00e4lv. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

S\u00e5 nu \u00e4r en Center nedk\u00f6rd i halsen. K\u00e4nns redan b\u00e4ttre. Det \u00e4r som morfin. Man beh\u00f6ver snabbverkande och mer l\u00e5ngtidsverkande f\u00f6r att h\u00e5lla sm\u00e4rta i schack. Sockertillf\u00f6rselbehov f\u00f6ljer samma m\u00f6nster. Center (eller nougat) l\u00f6ser det omedelbara problemet. Vic’s bl\u00e5 r\u00e4cker en stund och st\u00e5r d\u00e4rf\u00f6r f\u00f6r den mer l\u00e5ngtidsverkande effekten. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nej d\u00e5. Inga d\u00e5liga samveten h\u00e4r inte. Jag beh\u00f6ver verkligen det h\u00e4r idag. S\u00e4kert.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nu sitter jag allts\u00e5 h\u00e4r med ett sinne som \u00e4r lugnare. Visserligen \u00e4r jag fortfarande aningen d\u00f6ven men nu finns i alla fall viljan att ta sig ur och bort fr\u00e5n det d\u00e4r apatiskt d\u00f6vna. All f\u00f6rb\u00e4ttring av sig sj\u00e4lv m\u00e5ste s\u00e5klart ha sitt ursprung i just viljan att g\u00f6ra den d\u00e4r f\u00f6rb\u00e4ttringen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Aprop\u00e5 Backa-Jan. Det skall t\u00e4ndas ljus f\u00f6r de som har g\u00e5tt bort nu i helgen. Vi klarar av det d\u00e4r p\u00e5 fredagen. Antagligen bl\u00e5ser det en iskall vind d\u00e4r p\u00e5 Ovan\u00e5kers kyrkog\u00e5rd d\u00e5 liksom det gjort alla \u00e5r tidigare. Det \u00e4r en speciell kyla som drar in d\u00e4r \u00f6ver de d\u00f6das viloplats. D\u00f6dens utandning. De flesta jag en g\u00e5ng k\u00e4nt ligger d\u00e4r p\u00e5 kyrkog\u00e5rden. Ljus vi t\u00e4nder f\u00e5r g\u00e4lla f\u00f6r dom alla. De \u00e4r f\u00f6r m\u00e5nga numera f\u00f6r att man skall kunna r\u00e4kna upp dem alla i huvudet n\u00e4r man st\u00e5r d\u00e4r och t\u00e4nker. Man f\u00e5r avhandla dem alla i klump. Backa-Jan d\u00e4remot f\u00e5r ett ljus h\u00e4r hemma. Eftersom han \u00e4r den sn\u00e4llaste och mest osj\u00e4lviska m\u00e4nniska jag n\u00e5gonsin tr\u00e4ffat p\u00e5.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men det d\u00e4r \u00e4r imorgon det. Idag \u00e4r idag. Nu \u00e4r nu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ulf, han Lundell, 71, ringer. Men jag svarar inte. Surgubbe. Kan h\u00e5llas d\u00e4r i Sk\u00e5ne. Ja det kan han. Ring inte mer. Skriv inga fler “Vardagar”. Skriv om helgen, festen. Gubbj\u00e4vel.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Annars h\u00e4nder allts\u00e5 inte mycket. Det f\u00e5r h\u00e4nda nu<\/strong> ist\u00e4llet. \u00c4n \u00e4r inte dagen slut. Det kan ha h\u00e4nt mycket innan den \u00e4r det.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Liksom<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

—-<\/p>\n\n\n\n

D\u00f6ven<\/em><\/strong> – Utifall det \u00e4r Ovan\u00e5kersm\u00e5l kommer f\u00f6rklaring. Betydelse: M\u00e5 lite halvd\u00e5ligt s\u00e5d\u00e4r. B\u00f6rjan p\u00e5 f\u00f6rkylning eller s\u00e5d\u00e4r.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Jag \u00e4ter inte godis under veckorna. S\u00e5 har det varit ganska l\u00e4nge. Oftast har det d\u00e4r bara blivit brutet n\u00e4r Backa-Jan d\u00f6k upp med en whiskyflaska och fem p\u00e5sar Vic’s bl\u00e5 och det d\u00e4r okynniga leendet som bara han hade. Busleendet. Men idag. Det g\u00e5r inte leva vidare utan tillf\u00f6rt socker. Jag k\u00e4nner mig d\u00f6ven. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-36597","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":12947,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=12947","url_meta":{"origin":36597,"position":0},"title":"Korv och livr\u00e4ddning","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2014-04-23","format":false,"excerpt":"Jag har haft en bra dag idag. F\u00f6rst och fr\u00e4mst r\u00e4ddade jag ett liv idag. Det var v\u00e4ldigt n\u00e4ra att individen i fr\u00e5ga h\u00f6ll p\u00e5 att f\u00e5 s\u00e4tta livet till men i sista sekund kom jag till dess r\u00e4ddning. En spindel modell st\u00f6rre n\u00e4mligen. En som bosatt sig i studion\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"giraff","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/04\/giraff1.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":39105,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=39105","url_meta":{"origin":36597,"position":1},"title":"Glass","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2021-06-10","format":false,"excerpt":"Kan man \u00e4ta en sk\u00e5l med glass klockan tio? \"Ja det kan man\" s\u00e4ger han\/hon\/det\/gud h\u00f6gt och tydligt n\u00e4r jag nu \u00e4nd\u00e5 fr\u00e5gar. F\u00f6rsta g\u00e5ngen jag har haft nytta av en guddom faktiskt. Det l\u00e4r inte h\u00e4nda igen. Har aldrig h\u00e4nt tidigare. Men gott var det. Smakade utm\u00e4rkt. Trotts l\u00e5gprisglass.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/IMG_20210606_120643-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/IMG_20210606_120643-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/IMG_20210606_120643-scaled.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/IMG_20210606_120643-scaled.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/IMG_20210606_120643-scaled.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/IMG_20210606_120643-scaled.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":38608,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=38608","url_meta":{"origin":36597,"position":2},"title":"Jord","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2021-04-27","format":false,"excerpt":"Photo by Elianne Dipp on Pexels.com Det beh\u00f6vs jord. 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Kanske en\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Swedish"","block_context":{"text":"Swedish","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=2"},"img":{"alt_text":"scuba diver under water","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/pexels-photo-4666754.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/pexels-photo-4666754.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/pexels-photo-4666754.jpeg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/pexels-photo-4666754.jpeg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":39931,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=39931","url_meta":{"origin":36597,"position":3},"title":"OJ OJ OJ","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2021-09-23","format":false,"excerpt":"H\u00e4rliga underbara regnv\u00e4dersdag. Det \u00e4r riktigt ruskigt. Rent av urruskigt. Man kan bara koda. VILL bara koda. G\u00e4r det allts\u00e5. H \u00c4 R L I G T!!! \u00e4r ordet. H\u00f6sten \u00e4r verkligen h\u00e4r. Japp, p\u00e5 riktigt. Kodars\u00e4song. En l\u00e5ng och v\u00e4derm\u00e4ssigt el\u00e4ndig s\u00e5dan hoppas man. Regna och bl\u00e5s p\u00e5 bara.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/IMG_20210915_141323-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/IMG_20210915_141323-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/IMG_20210915_141323-scaled.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/IMG_20210915_141323-scaled.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/IMG_20210915_141323-scaled.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/09\/IMG_20210915_141323-scaled.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":47566,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=47566","url_meta":{"origin":36597,"position":4},"title":"Att oelda","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2024-04-23","format":false,"excerpt":"Det \u00e4r tisdag. 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Jod\u00e5, lysr\u00f6r bytte jag i alla fall. Och jag \u00f6verlevde. \u00c4nnu en g\u00e5ng. Har snart f\u00f6rbrukat mina \"kattliv\" i det avseendet. Yngre krafter f\u00e5r ta vid. Som p\u00e5 taket av huset. 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