{"id":34986,"date":"2020-04-23T08:42:31","date_gmt":"2020-04-23T07:42:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=34986"},"modified":"2024-01-09T16:29:50","modified_gmt":"2024-01-09T15:29:50","slug":"trottheten-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=34986","title":{"rendered":"Tr\u00f6ttheten"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Det finns ingen \u00e4nde p\u00e5 tr\u00f6ttheten i dessa tider. Varje dag handlar mest om HUR tr\u00f6tt man \u00e4r. Kanske \u00e4r det s\u00e5dant som h\u00e4nder gamla gubbar efter sextio. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tr\u00f6tt allts\u00e5. Idag. Skall st\u00e4da. F\u00f6rs\u00f6ker samla kraft till den uppgiften. Skulle antagligen beh\u00f6vas kokain f\u00f6r att f\u00e5 ig\u00e5ng lekamliga energier, men te f\u00e5r duga. Har aldrig varit s\u00e5 mycket f\u00f6r de d\u00e4r h\u00e5rda centralstimulerande grejerna. Kaffe, te, whisky och socker \u00e4r min grej. V\u00e5gar inte v\u00e4cka allt det andra som finns inom mig. T\u00e4nker jag. Tror jag \u00e4r en typisk missbruksperson.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hela dagen ig\u00e5r g\u00e5r \u00e5t till att f\u00f6rs\u00f6ka \u00e5terst\u00e4lla det som en f\u00f6rlorad server inneb\u00e4r. F\u00e5r till det mesta fram mot natten. Nu finns inga reservdelar kvar. Allt har g\u00e5tt \u00e5t och \u00e4r l\u00e4mnat till \u00e5tervinningen. 557 dagar kvar n\u00e4r det som nu rullar m\u00e5ste fungera. Men man vet inte. Ibland ramlar det in ett gammalt moderkort eller en sk\u00e4rm fr\u00e5n ov\u00e4ntat h\u00e5ll. Jag \u00e4r inte kr\u00e4sen. Det som andra f\u00f6r l\u00e4nge sedan ser som skrot \u00e4r ofta guld h\u00e4r. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Det brukar i alla fall ordna sig.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hostar s\u00e5klart fortfarande. \u00c4r ju synd att sluta n\u00e4r man en g\u00e5ng har b\u00f6rjat. Om man nu ser p\u00e5 det p\u00e5 det viset. Men f\u00f6rb\u00e4ttringar. Avsev\u00e4rda. Har uppn\u00e5tts.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kortmeningar. Gillar fortfarande. Inte alla andra g\u00f6r det. Fattar inte. Det \u00e4r OK.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Trotts Corona och skit s\u00e5 g\u00e5r vi in i enklare tider h\u00e4r p\u00e5 kullen. Vi har tv\u00e5 ekonomier. En eldingss\u00e4songsekonomi och en sommarekonomi. Livet l\u00e4ttar v\u00e4sentligt under den ena. V\u00e4n av matematik tycker d\u00e5 s\u00e5klart att man b\u00f6r spara under pl\u00e5nboksfull tid f\u00f6r att j\u00e4mna ute pl\u00e5nbokstunn tid men det fungerar ju aldrig s\u00e5. H\u00e5ller man igen alla utgifter under ett halv\u00e5r s\u00e5 f\u00e5r man ist\u00e4llet hosta upp pengarna det andra halv\u00e5ret. Verklighet kallas det. \u00c4ger man ett hus g\u00e4ller det d\u00e4r i h\u00f6gsta grad.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men sommar allts\u00e5. Den g\u00e5r att bada trotts all skit som nu h\u00e4nder i v\u00e4rlden. Det g\u00e5r att \u00e5ka ut i skogen. Gissar att till och med Koltrasten kommer att sjunga sina s\u00e5nger. Ja och att sova med det d\u00e4r \u00f6ppna f\u00f6nstret, l\u00e5ta sommarvindar smeka en d\u00e4r man ligger i s\u00e4ngen och sakta vaknar till en ny dag. Grilla borde ocks\u00e5 g\u00e5. L\u00e4gga sig i gr\u00e4set och titta p\u00e5 bulliga molnen som sakta \u00e5ker f\u00f6rbi likas\u00e5. Ja man borde till och med kunna f\u00e5 ett glas rose` ibland. Det borde allts\u00e5 inte g\u00e5 n\u00e5gon st\u00f6rre n\u00f6d p\u00e5 en. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fast man l\u00e4r v\u00e4l gn\u00e4lla \u00e4nd\u00e5. Kanske h\u00f6r det till \u00e5ldern det ocks\u00e5.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men jag har alltid varit bra p\u00e5 att leva i nuet. Jag kan njuta i stunden fast v\u00e4rlden h\u00e5ller p\u00e5 att rasa samman runt omkring mig. En egenskap som antagligen gjort att jag \u00f6verlevt sv\u00e5r\u00e5ren. Efter en konkurs d\u00e4r man mister allt g\u00e4ller det att hitta p\u00e4rlorna och njut av dem. Lever man med efterdyningarna av det d\u00e4r haveriet i tjugonio \u00e5r blir man expert p\u00e5 att hitta gl\u00e4dje i det enkla. Tro mig.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fast nu enklare tider allts\u00e5. Hulken f\u00e5r v\u00e4l g\u00e5 en vecka till. Sen dags f\u00f6r hans v\u00e4lf\u00f6rtj\u00e4nta vila. Jag m\u00e5ste bara f\u00e5 ig\u00e5ng varmvattenberedaren. Ett projekt som blir en riktig p\u00e4rs s\u00e5klart eftersom jag ser s\u00e5 j\u00e4vla illa. Men det f\u00e5r g\u00e5. Det m\u00e5ste g\u00e5<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nu skall jag koppla mina lurar till min telefon, vr\u00e4ka p\u00e5 lite musik och sen st\u00e4da. Inte roligt s\u00e5klart. Men s\u00e4tter man ig\u00e5ng med det s\u00e5 blir man av med det. Min devis. Ta det tr\u00e5kiga f\u00f6rst. Tyv\u00e4rr inneb\u00e4r det n\u00e4stan alltid att jag s\u00e4llan hinner med det roliga. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Lev!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Det finns ingen \u00e4nde p\u00e5 tr\u00f6ttheten i dessa tider. Varje dag handlar mest om HUR tr\u00f6tt man \u00e4r. Kanske \u00e4r det s\u00e5dant som h\u00e4nder gamla gubbar efter sextio. Tr\u00f6tt allts\u00e5. Idag. Skall st\u00e4da. F\u00f6rs\u00f6ker samla kraft till den uppgiften. Skulle antagligen beh\u00f6vas kokain f\u00f6r att f\u00e5 ig\u00e5ng lekamliga energier, men te f\u00e5r duga. Har aldrig […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-34986","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":39576,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=39576","url_meta":{"origin":34986,"position":0},"title":"Sommarkollo","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2021-08-09","format":false,"excerpt":"Photo by Jonathan Petersson on Pexels.com Tr\u00f6tthetens monster kl\u00e4ttrar upp p\u00e5 mina axlar och h\u00e4nger sig kvar d\u00e4r. En tung j\u00e4vel. Eller dj\u00e4vel. Eller kanske rent utav dj\u00e4vul. Inte vad jag r\u00e4knade med att b\u00e4ra p\u00e5 nu ikv\u00e4ll. Tanken vara att sitta n\u00e5gon timme till h\u00e4r p\u00e5 l\u00e5tsaskontoret. Bli \"klar\"\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"green leafed trees","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/pexels-photo-421759.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/pexels-photo-421759.jpeg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/pexels-photo-421759.jpeg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/pexels-photo-421759.jpeg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/pexels-photo-421759.jpeg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/pexels-photo-421759.jpeg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":34979,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=34979","url_meta":{"origin":34986,"position":1},"title":"Sista sucken","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2020-04-21","format":false,"excerpt":"Tr\u00f6ttheten tar tag i mig idag. Trotts vackert v\u00e4der. Trotts v\u00e4rme. Eller kanske just d\u00e4rf\u00f6r. Energin \u00e4r hur som helst helt bortbl\u00e5st. Jag f\u00f6rs\u00f6ker med n\u00e5gra v\u00e4ndor i tr\u00e4dg\u00e5rden. Njuter. Lyssnar. Ser varje pinne som en lekande huggorm. Varje prasslande l\u00f6v som en r\u00e5tta. Det \u00e4r inte samma sak att\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/IMG_20200421_104245021_HDR.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/IMG_20200421_104245021_HDR.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/IMG_20200421_104245021_HDR.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/04\/IMG_20200421_104245021_HDR.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":45700,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=45700","url_meta":{"origin":34986,"position":2},"title":"Om","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2023-08-11","format":false,"excerpt":"Jack, the tired man, \u00e4r det jag det? Ja, i alla fall k\u00e4nns det s\u00e5. Har k\u00e4nts s\u00e5 hela veckan. Jag orkar knappt g\u00e5 upp f\u00f6r trappan. Upp kommer jag \u00e4nd\u00e5 s\u00e5klart. Fl\u00e5sande. Men utf\u00f6r g\u00e5r det med gubben den som \u00e4r jag. F\u00f6rhoppningsvis \u00e4r det tillf\u00e4lligt och n\u00e5got som\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Swedish"","block_context":{"text":"Swedish","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=2"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/img014.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/img014.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/img014.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/08\/img014.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":25948,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=25948","url_meta":{"origin":34986,"position":3},"title":"Flytta?","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2017-11-14","format":false,"excerpt":"Jag tittar p\u00e5 v\u00e5rt gamla hus n\u00e4r jag har tagit mig upp f\u00f6r backarna efter promenaden och undrar om det \u00e4r h\u00e4r jag vill d\u00f6. Ja man kan allts\u00e5 v\u00e4nda p\u00e5 det d\u00e4r. \"\u00c4r det h\u00e4r man vill leva\" ja och l\u00e4gga till \"tills man d\u00f6r\". Men min utg\u00e5ngspunkt \u00e4r\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/IMG_20171114_080149610_HDR-1024x768.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/IMG_20171114_080149610_HDR-1024x768.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/IMG_20171114_080149610_HDR-1024x768.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":33917,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=33917","url_meta":{"origin":34986,"position":4},"title":"Dan f\u00f6re dan","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2019-12-23","format":false,"excerpt":"Jag \u00e4r lite sp\u00e4nd s\u00e5h\u00e4r dan f\u00f6r dan. Varje \u00e5r. Men om man var pirrig som liten f\u00f6r att man kanske skulle f\u00e5 de d\u00e4r presenter som man \u00f6nskat sig s\u00e5 \u00e4r orsaken en helt annan nu som vuxen. Det \u00e4r s\u00e5 mycket som skall klaffa. Viktigast \u00e4r bilen. Brakar\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/burning_sun.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/burning_sun.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/04\/burning_sun.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":24781,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=24781","url_meta":{"origin":34986,"position":5},"title":"Med en oklump i magen","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2017-06-29","format":false,"excerpt":"Det finns liksom inget att oroa sig f\u00f6r. Nehej.... Jaha och... tanken liksom l\u00e4gger sig till r\u00e4tta d\u00e4r i huvudet. Men t\u00e4nker man s\u00e5, l\u00e5ter man den tanken \u00e5ka in i huvudet och drar ett andetag, som man ju nu m\u00e5ste med j\u00e4mna mellanrum,\u00a0 s\u00e5 \u00e4r det annorlunda att andas.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/06\/img004-1024x710.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/06\/img004-1024x710.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/06\/img004-1024x710.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p68PL2-96i","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/34986","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/24"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=34986"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/34986\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":46887,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/34986\/revisions\/46887"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=34986"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=34986"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=34986"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}