{"id":33603,"date":"2019-11-21T08:56:59","date_gmt":"2019-11-21T07:56:59","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=33603"},"modified":"2019-11-21T08:56:59","modified_gmt":"2019-11-21T07:56:59","slug":"ny-dag-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=33603","title":{"rendered":"Ny dag"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Har t\u00e4nt mitt ljus. Men f\u00f6rst har jag sandat, fyllt f\u00e5gelmat och matat Huilken. I den ordningen. Frukost, kattmatning, axel\u00f6vnigar och dusch or\u00e4knade. Men allt det d\u00e4r \u00e4r vardag. Vintervardag. Brukar vara lite sopa bro och skottning ocks\u00e5 s\u00e5klart s\u00e5h\u00e4r p\u00e5 vintern. Men annars \u00e4r dagarna r\u00e4tt lika h\u00e4r p\u00e5 en kulle ute i ingenstans.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

G\u00e5 min timmesrunda borde jag ocks\u00e5. Men halt och n\u00e5got tr\u00f6ttande iu kroppen h\u00e5ller mig tillbaks d\u00e4r. Enkla urs\u00e4kter s\u00e5klart fr\u00e5n en sl\u00f6ing. Jag m\u00e5r ju bra av det d\u00e4r.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men nu in i min egen v\u00e4rld. \u00c5kes v\u00e4rld. D\u00e4r, d\u00e4r jag trivs som b\u00e4st. Ja, fast sant \u00e4r det kanske inte det sista. Trivs lika bra vid havet och i skogen och i gr\u00f6n IKEA soffa. Just det d\u00e4r handlar mest om hur man \u00e4r inne i huvudet. Som n\u00e4r man s\u00e4ger att man l\u00e4ngtar bort fr\u00e5n Los. Egentligen \u00e4r det sig sj\u00e4lv man l\u00e4ngtar bort ifr\u00e5n. Den d\u00e4r l\u00e4ngtan bort hade varit densamma om man bott i Stockholm eller New York. Man flyr aldrig fr\u00e5n det egna jaget. Fastlimmad d\u00e4r. M\u00e5ste st\u00e5 ut hur tr\u00f6tt man \u00e4n kan bli p\u00e5 sig sj\u00e4lv. Underlig \u00e4r ju inte den d\u00e4r tr\u00f6ttheten \u00e4nd\u00e5. Man m\u00e5ste st\u00e5 ut med sina egna tankar 24\/7. Ja och s\u00e5 imponerande \u00e4r de \u00e4nd\u00e5 inte f\u00f6r det mesta. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jag gillar Los. Annars hade jag s\u00e5klart inte blivit kvar. Eller vi. Men det \u00e4r inte ett f\u00f6rbeh\u00e5llsl\u00f6st gillande. \u00c4kta k\u00e4nslor kan inte vara det. V\u00e4rlden \u00e4r inte svart och vit. Inget \u00e4r perfekt. Inget \u00e4r d\u00e5ligt. Allt \u00e4r n\u00e5got d\u00e4remellan. Jag blir alltid misst\u00e4nksam mot dem som befinner sig i ytterligheterna. De kan vara helt dumma i huvudet eller ocks\u00e5 ljuger de. Det finns inga andra alternativ. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

G\u00e5rdagens kodareufori l\u00e4r v\u00e4l g\u00e5 \u00f6ver om en kvart. Det beh\u00f6vs bara verkliga problem f\u00f6r att man skall falla ner p\u00e5 jorden igen. Verkliga problem \u00e4r universum fullt av. Man beh\u00f6ver inte ens s\u00f6ka efter dom. Men det \u00e4r v\u00e4l det programmeraryrket och ingenj\u00f6rsyrket handlar om. Att l\u00f6sa problem. Det \u00e4r det man m\u00e5ste gilla f\u00f6r att kunna h\u00e5lla p\u00e5. Bensin \u00e4r de d\u00e4r korta \u00f6gonblicken av seger. Som ig\u00e5r. Antar att det inte \u00e4r s\u00e5 stor skillnad mot vilken idrottsman som helst f\u00f6rresten. O\u00e4ndliga serier och dagar av h\u00e5rd tr\u00e4ning. Korta \u00f6gonblick av rampljus och medaljer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fast medaljer ramlar det ju s\u00e4llan in h\u00e4r s\u00e5klart. H\u00e4r f\u00e5r man klappa sig sj\u00e4lv p\u00e5 axeln. F\u00f6rsiktigt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Godmorgon<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Har t\u00e4nt mitt ljus. Men f\u00f6rst har jag sandat, fyllt f\u00e5gelmat och matat Huilken. I den ordningen. Frukost, kattmatning, axel\u00f6vnigar och dusch or\u00e4knade. Men allt det d\u00e4r \u00e4r vardag. Vintervardag. Brukar vara lite sopa bro och skottning ocks\u00e5 s\u00e5klart s\u00e5h\u00e4r p\u00e5 vintern. Men annars \u00e4r dagarna r\u00e4tt lika h\u00e4r p\u00e5 en kulle ute i ingenstans. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-33603","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":27351,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=27351","url_meta":{"origin":33603,"position":0},"title":"Somnar","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2018-03-01","format":false,"excerpt":"Nyheter. Rapport. Jag somnar. S\u00e5klart. K \u00e4r p\u00e5 konferens. Jag allts\u00e5 gr\u00e4s\u00e4nkling. Vad annat kan en gammal man g\u00f6ra. Men jag sover inte s\u00e5 l\u00e4nge. Jag vaknar ungef\u00e4r n\u00e4r de lokala nyheterna b\u00f6rjar. Missar allt vad nationella och internationella nyheter har att s\u00e4ga oss idag allts\u00e5. 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S\u00e5 jag avvaktar en natt. L\u00e5ter kontot ligga d\u00e4r \u00f6ppet och puttra. L\u00e4tt utr\u00f6kt. Svettigt. Utan deodorant. Men bara tills imorgon. Sen bort igen. Flyendes som en feg liten stackare st\u00e4nger jag ner\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"IMG_1846","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/IMG_1846-1024x768.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/IMG_1846-1024x768.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/05\/IMG_1846-1024x768.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":25154,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=25154","url_meta":{"origin":33603,"position":2},"title":"Senast l\u00e4sta bok","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2017-08-28","format":false,"excerpt":"1968 av Jan Guillou (Adlibris h\u00e4r) Ni som f\u00f6ljer min blogg vet att jag har verkligen gillat den h\u00e4r serien av Jan Guillou. VERKLIGEN GILLAR! Jan har ett s\u00e4tt att v\u00e4nda p\u00e5 perspektiven som f\u00e5r ens tankar att \u00e5ka med i en hissnande berg och dalbana d\u00e4r man l\u00e4r sig\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "B\u00f6cker"","block_context":{"text":"B\u00f6cker","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=13"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/08\/9789164205155_200x_1968.jpeg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":19564,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=19564","url_meta":{"origin":33603,"position":3},"title":"“Give me a break!”","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2016-01-26","format":false,"excerpt":"Jag borde ut och g\u00e5 min runda \"men det \u00e4r f\u00f6r moddigt\", jo jo man letar sina urs\u00e4kter och har hittat en varje dag hittills under det nya \u00e5ret men jag m\u00e5ste verkligen komma ig\u00e5ng igen. Jag m\u00e5r bra av det d\u00e4r. En v\u00e4g, en stig, jag och tankarna. Lite\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"e05a1f37-d052-408f-926c-964b664c0454","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/e05a1f37-d052-408f-926c-964b664c0454.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":10627,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=10627","url_meta":{"origin":33603,"position":4},"title":"K\u00e4rlek vid f\u00f6rsta \u00f6gonkastet","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2013-10-22","format":false,"excerpt":"Hon f\u00f6r mig igenom lokalerna. Nog ser det snyggt och fr\u00e4scht ut allt. Javisst gymnasieskolan ligger i ett industriomr\u00e5de med en stor \u00e5tervinningsanl\u00e4ggning som granne, men inuti huset \u00e4r det trevligt. Det blir ofta det n\u00e4r ungarna trivs och m\u00e5r bra. H\u00e4r finns inte s\u00e5 mycket skadeg\u00f6relse. Ett gott tecken\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"love-at-first-sight11","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/10\/love-at-first-sight11.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/10\/love-at-first-sight11.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/10\/love-at-first-sight11.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":27126,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=27126","url_meta":{"origin":33603,"position":5},"title":"Det \u00e4r gott","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2018-02-13","format":false,"excerpt":"Det \u00e4r gott. Jod\u00e5 det skulle s\u00e4kert kunnat vara p\u00e5 n\u00e5got annat s\u00e4tt. Men det \u00e4r som det \u00e4r. Gott eller el\u00e4ndigt kan man best\u00e4mma sj\u00e4lv. F\u00f6r det mesta. S\u00e5 jag best\u00e4mmer mig f\u00f6r gott. F\u00f6r att det k\u00e4nns s\u00e5. Sn\u00f6n singlar inte ned l\u00e4ngre.\u00a0 Det \u00e4r bra. 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