{"id":33438,"date":"2019-11-04T22:54:02","date_gmt":"2019-11-04T21:54:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=33438"},"modified":"2019-11-04T22:54:02","modified_gmt":"2019-11-04T21:54:02","slug":"melankolia","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=33438","title":{"rendered":"Melankolia"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

St\u00e4ller ut soptunnan. Det \u00e4r -4. Ingen temperatur f\u00f6r en riktig Norrl\u00e4nning s\u00e5klart. Men f\u00f6r mig, en enkel ocool gubbe, inneb\u00e4r det att jag h\u00e5ller p\u00e5 att frysa ihj\u00e4l. Fryslort \u00e4r<\/strong> man. Fryslort blir<\/strong> man inte. S\u00e5 in rusar jag snabbt. S\u00e5 snabbt nu en gammal gubbe kan r\u00f6ra sig.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

K\u00f6r \ud83d\ude41 listan<\/a> idag. Melankolin \u00e4r \u00f6ver mig. Underligt \u00e4r att den listan \u00e4r mycket l\u00e4ngre \u00e4n \ud83d\ude42 listan<\/a>. S\u00e5 ofta som jag trollar mig ner i melankolin s\u00e5 borde det v\u00e4l vara tv\u00e4rtom. Men det kan inte hj\u00e4lpas, det \u00e4r v\u00e4l det d\u00e4r med att ha sin f\u00f6delsedag kring allhelgonahelgen igen. Ingen kan bli riktigt munter med en s\u00e5dan uppv\u00e4xt. Det f\u00f6rst\u00e5r ju alla.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nu \u00e4r det ju s\u00e5 att jag gillar det d\u00e4r lite l\u00e5ga. \u00c4r som mest kreativ h\u00e4r nere. Njuter lite av det helt enkelt. Ja det \u00e4r v\u00e4l n\u00e5got fel p\u00e5 mig helt enkelt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Imorgon skall kamrat opereras f\u00f6r cancer, Jag sitter s\u00e5klart h\u00e4r och h\u00e5ller alla tummar. Men det brukar g\u00e5 bra. Folket i Uppsala \u00e4r duktiga. En tidig uppt\u00e4ckt brukar resultera i fortsatt l\u00e5ngt liv. I det h\u00e4r fallet \u00e4r alla prognoser goda efter vad jag f\u00f6rst\u00e5r. Men allvarligt \u00e4nd\u00e5 s\u00e5klart. Det \u00e4r liksom inget sk\u00e4mt. Fuck Cancer!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jag borde egentligen g\u00e5 och l\u00e4gga mig men sitter h\u00e4r och knappar kod \u00e4nd\u00e5. Det \u00e4r ju s\u00e5nt som en s\u00e5dan d\u00e4r som jag g\u00f6r. \u00c4r inte bra p\u00e5 n\u00e5got annat. Ja, \u00e4r jag ens bra p\u00e5 det?`Hur avg\u00f6r man s\u00e5dant. Andra avg\u00f6r s\u00e5klart. Ofta de som inte har en aning. D\u00e5 \u00e4r man s\u00e5klart s\u00e4nkt redan fr\u00e5n start. Jag \u00e4r s\u00e5 oerh\u00f6rt avundsjuk p\u00e5 dem som har folk omkring sig som tror p\u00e5 det dom g\u00f6r och st\u00f6ttar dom. Ja, jo, och visst. Man skall inte vara avundsjuk. Det \u00e4r fult och dumt. Men jag \u00e4r det i alla fall. Just n\u00e4r det g\u00e4ller det h\u00e4r. Inser att det g\u00f6r mig till en d\u00e5lig m\u00e4nniska. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men p\u00e5 torsdag blir det allts\u00e5 fiber h\u00e4r i huset om inget of\u00f6rutsett h\u00e4nder. Jag tror inte riktigt p\u00e5 det d\u00e4r innan allt \u00e4r p\u00e5 plats och fungerar. Men en milstolpe \u00e4r det. Om det fungerar. FANTASTISKT!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fast \u00e4n finns lite tid att knappa p\u00e5 innan l\u00e5tsasarbetsdagen \u00e4r till \u00e4nda. Imorgon \u00e4r en annan dag. Vi f\u00e5r se om det blir \ud83d\ude42 listan eller \ud83d\ude41 listan imorgon. Idag vet ingen. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

St\u00e4ller ut soptunnan. Det \u00e4r -4. Ingen temperatur f\u00f6r en riktig Norrl\u00e4nning s\u00e5klart. Men f\u00f6r mig, en enkel ocool gubbe, inneb\u00e4r det att jag h\u00e5ller p\u00e5 att frysa ihj\u00e4l. Fryslort \u00e4r man. Fryslort blir man inte. S\u00e5 in rusar jag snabbt. S\u00e5 snabbt nu en gammal gubbe kan r\u00f6ra sig. K\u00f6r \ud83d\ude41 listan idag. Melankolin […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-33438","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":39610,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=39610","url_meta":{"origin":33438,"position":0},"title":"Dom?","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2021-08-17","format":false,"excerpt":"\"Jag skall nog visa dom\". Jo jag har nog sagt det till mig sj\u00e4lv sen tio\u00e5rs\u00e5ldern. M\u00e5nga g\u00e5nger. 64*365 ~23000 n\u00e5gonting borde det bli. Ja, l\u00e4gg till 10000 p\u00e5 det. Sv\u00e5ra dar har jag nog sagt eller t\u00e4nkt det d\u00e4r mer \u00e4n en g\u00e5ng p\u00e5 ett dygn. Nu s\u00e5h\u00e4r med\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210811_225118-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210811_225118-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210811_225118-scaled.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210811_225118-scaled.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210811_225118-scaled.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210811_225118-scaled.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":23580,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=23580","url_meta":{"origin":33438,"position":1},"title":"Runt runt runt","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2017-03-07","format":false,"excerpt":"Det \u00e4r s\u00e5d\u00e4r lite sk\u00f6nt kallt p\u00e5 min promenad. Minus nio. De d\u00e4r orden kan vara v\u00e4rda att spara p\u00e5, f\u00f6r de kommer inte upprepas allt f\u00f6rr ofta av en fryslort som mig. Men hur det \u00e4n \u00e4r \u00e4r det kring tio minus som vintern \u00e4r som b\u00e4st. Man fryser\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/20170307_075751-1024x576.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/20170307_075751-1024x576.png?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/03\/20170307_075751-1024x576.png?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":44095,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=44095","url_meta":{"origin":33438,"position":2},"title":"Den f\u00f6rsta dan","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2023-01-23","format":false,"excerpt":"Minus femton n\u00e4r man kliver upp och tretton nu. Kung Bores regering best\u00e4mmer temperaturen. P\u00e5 kullen fryser vi. N\u00e5ja, inte s\u00e5 mycket, men lagom. Lagom i alla fall om man h\u00e5ller sig inne. Bara K m\u00e5ste ge sig ut. Fast kontoret \u00e4r inte direkt behagligt. Min v\u00e4n v\u00e4rmefl\u00e4kten f\u00e5r burra\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/IMG_20220201_095204-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/IMG_20220201_095204-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/IMG_20220201_095204-scaled.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/IMG_20220201_095204-scaled.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/IMG_20220201_095204-scaled.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/01\/IMG_20220201_095204-scaled.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2749,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=2749","url_meta":{"origin":33438,"position":3},"title":"Medelm\u00e5ttor \u00e4r vi allihopa.","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2013-01-24","format":false,"excerpt":"Dom flesta inser v\u00e4l n\u00e5gonstans i 30-40 \u00e5rs \u00e5ldern att dom \u00e4r medelm\u00e5ttor som alla andra. F\u00f6r mig - tr\u00f6gheten sj\u00e4lv - har det tagit lite l\u00e4ngre tid. Jag ligger nog sis\u00e5d\u00e4r 15 \u00e5r efter min \u00e5lder utvecklingsm\u00e4ssigt. Beh\u00f6ver fundera lite mer innan jag fattar liksom. Det \u00e4r f\u00f6rst nu\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"gris-stor","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2012\/12\/gris-stor1.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":40131,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=40131","url_meta":{"origin":33438,"position":4},"title":"Nu l\u00e4ll","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2021-10-26","format":false,"excerpt":"Photo by Sultan Raimosan on Pexels.com Han skog och fors ringer. Gubbe. S\u00e5klart. Annars hade han skrivit ett email. Men oldie d\u00e5. Vi pratar en stund. V\u00e4rlden blir inte b\u00e4ttre f\u00f6r den skull. Fast social tr\u00e4ning kan man v\u00e4l kalla det f\u00f6r min del. Han k\u00f6r buss. 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