{"id":31684,"date":"2019-03-18T11:49:01","date_gmt":"2019-03-18T10:49:01","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=31684"},"modified":"2019-03-18T11:49:09","modified_gmt":"2019-03-18T10:49:09","slug":"vantan","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=31684","title":{"rendered":"V\u00e4ntan"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Sn\u00f6d\u00e4mp. En redig en. Nattens v\u00e4der. Men mig ber\u00f6r den inte mycket. N & K och sn\u00e4ll traktorf\u00f6rare tar hand om det som faller ner. L\u00e4gger upp i h\u00f6gar som snart skall sm\u00e4lta bort och sen porlande och forsande starta sin resa ut mot v\u00e4rldshaven och kanske en stormig natt bli till sjumetersv\u00e5gor som sl\u00e5r in mot en fr\u00e4mmande str\u00e4nder. Varje molekyl del i samma kretslopp som vi alla \u00e4r en del av.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Torpederna som n\u00e4rmar sig stabsfatyget Visborg. Tre stycken. Jag minns dem ig\u00e5r. En passerar tio meter akter\u00f6ver, missar m\u00e5let, men tv\u00e5 sl\u00e5r in i fartygssidan med ett “donk”. Oladdade s\u00e5klart. Svensk fredstid och kallt krig handlar det \u00e4nd\u00e5 om och det \u00e4r stor \u00f6vning utanf\u00f6r G\u00f6teborg. Hade de varit laddade fanns jag inte nu. Men det \u00e4r s\u00e5klart inte ett minne v\u00e4rt att dela med n\u00e5gon annan. Ingenting. Japp ingenting \u00e4r det. Man har kommit in i den \u00e5lder n\u00e4r alla ens upplevelser bara \u00e4r luft och ingenting f\u00f6r den som man i en svag stund tror \u00e4r en intresserad lyssnare. S\u00e5 man tystnar mer och mer f\u00f6r varje \u00e5r. Sv\u00e4ljer sina upplevelser. Packar undan id\u00e9erna. Blir en avsk\u00e4rmad \u00f6 bland andra \u00f6ar. \u00d6verl\u00e5ter nutiden till Facebooksnuttarna.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

M\u00e4nniskorna… Jag blir avundsjuk n\u00e4r helgen, ja troligtvis hela veckan, \u00e4r r\u00e4ddad n\u00e4r n\u00e5gon tar en medalj i skidskytte. Jag vill ocks\u00e5 k\u00e4nna s\u00e5d\u00e4r. Gl\u00e4djen n\u00e4r r\u00e4tt l\u00e5t vinner i Melodifestivalen. Euforin n\u00e4r favoritlaget i fotboll vinner kuppen. Stoltheten i att f\u00e5 ta en selfie med Bill Gates. Men det r\u00e4cker liksom inte f\u00f6r mig. Lite s\u00e5klart. Jag kan ocks\u00e5 gl\u00e4djas \u00f6ver en skidskyttemedalj. Men det r\u00e4cker liksom inte med att bara vara \u00e5sk\u00e5dare f\u00f6r mig. Har aldrig gjort. Bara arenor d\u00e4r jag \u00e4r en aktiv deltagare kan ge mig full tillfredsst\u00e4llelse. Jag \u00f6nskar att det inte var s\u00e5. Att det r\u00e4ckte \u00e4nd\u00e5. Fyllde en. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

En motst\u00e5ndssats fr\u00e5n Kina. Postnord vill ha 220 sp\u00e4nn plus moms f\u00f6r att f\u00f6rtulla. Tullen vill ha fjorton sp\u00e4nn p\u00e5 det. Motst\u00e5nden kostar femtio sp\u00e4nn. Sjukt. Signalen till Makers i Sverige. L\u00e4gg ner! \u00c4nd\u00e5 \u00e4r det h\u00e4r ingenj\u00f6ren b\u00f6rjar sin resa. Ja i Sverige, gjorde…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Fast nu l\u00e4ngtar jag efter koltrasts\u00e5ng. Det vackraste som finns. Men jag n\u00f6jer mig s\u00e5klart med talgoxar, domherrar och alla andra v\u00e4nners v\u00e5rgl\u00e4dje s\u00e5 l\u00e4nge. Men d\u00e4r borta finns mjukt gr\u00f6nt gr\u00e4s under bara f\u00f6tter, ljumma vindar, enkelhet, grilldoft och dag som aldrig riktigt blir till natt. Det v\u00e4rsta med vintern \u00e4r \u00f6ver. En pelletsbest\u00e4llning till s\u00e5 \u00e4r vi hemma det h\u00e4r \u00e5ret. Sen v\u00e4lf\u00f6rtj\u00e4nt vila f\u00f6r Hulken. De flesta fr\u00f6na \u00e4r nere i pottar och l\u00e5dor. Ocks\u00e5 det ombes\u00f6rjde K & N. Sommargl\u00e4dje p\u00e5 b\u00e5de tallrikar och i \u00f6gon och insugna i girigt sniffande n\u00e4sborrar. F\u00e4rgexplosioner. Smaksensationer. Sommarfyrverkeri utan knall. H\u00e4rliga tider. H\u00e4r fortare \u00e4n man tror.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Sn\u00f6d\u00e4mp. En redig en. Nattens v\u00e4der. Men mig ber\u00f6r den inte mycket. N & K och sn\u00e4ll traktorf\u00f6rare tar hand om det som faller ner. L\u00e4gger upp i h\u00f6gar som snart skall sm\u00e4lta bort och sen porlande och forsande starta sin resa ut mot v\u00e4rldshaven och kanske en stormig natt bli till sjumetersv\u00e5gor som sl\u00e5r […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-31684","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":29758,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=29758","url_meta":{"origin":31684,"position":0},"title":"Vansinnet","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2018-09-10","format":false,"excerpt":"Mer \u00e4n var fj\u00e4rde person jag springer p\u00e5 h\u00e4r i byn r\u00f6star p\u00e5 ett parti med ett nazistiskt ursprung. Ett parti som \u00e4r \u00f6ppet fr\u00e4mlingsfientligt. Jod\u00e5, jag tror s\u00e4kert att den stor del av de personer som r\u00f6star g\u00f6r det av n\u00e5gon slags protest mot etablissemanget. M\u00f6jligen \u00e4r just det\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/Screenshot-from-2018-09-09-22-31-00.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/Screenshot-from-2018-09-09-22-31-00.png?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/Screenshot-from-2018-09-09-22-31-00.png?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/09\/Screenshot-from-2018-09-09-22-31-00.png?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":23331,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=23331","url_meta":{"origin":31684,"position":1},"title":"Kojan","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2017-02-13","format":false,"excerpt":"Ungarnas koja. Det \u00e4r n\u00e4stan tv\u00e5 decennier sedan nu de h\u00f6ll p\u00e5. \u00d6verblivet virke, ett f\u00f6nster fr\u00e5n \u00e5tervinningen, spik, hammare och s\u00e5g. Det blev tv\u00e5 v\u00e5ningar. Sen gav de upp. Den har h\u00e4ngt d\u00e4r i de tre bj\u00f6rkarna sedan dess. Har klarat en avverkning. Har klarat regn, sn\u00f6, stormar och\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/kojan-1024x961.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/kojan-1024x961.png?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/02\/kojan-1024x961.png?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":9890,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=9890","url_meta":{"origin":31684,"position":2},"title":"“Usain Bolt”, s\u00e4ger ni!","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2013-09-19","format":false,"excerpt":"Katterna stannar i s\u00e4ngen n\u00e4r jag kliver upp precis som jag stannade d\u00e4r under t\u00e4cket n\u00e4r frun - en tr\u00f6tt dito - steg upp en timme tidigare. Den l\u00e5tsasjobbandes r\u00e4tt att inte st\u00e4lla klockan - n\u00e4stan aldrig i alla fall - och vakna n\u00e4r det beh\u00f6vs. \"N\u00e4r det beh\u00f6vs\" brukar\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Swedish"","block_context":{"text":"Swedish","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=2"},"img":{"alt_text":"download (2)","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/09\/download-2.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":17402,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=17402","url_meta":{"origin":31684,"position":3},"title":"S\u00f6derut","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2015-04-08","format":false,"excerpt":"Jag vandrar s\u00f6derut. Jag hade fel ig\u00e5r. S\u00f6derut \u00e4r \u00e5t det h\u00e5ll jag liksom k\u00e4nner att Edsbyn och \u00d6stersj\u00f6n och Ryssland ligger. Men har fel allts\u00e5. Det enda jag inte kan fatta n\u00e4r jag kommer fram till huset som jag \u00e4lskar och d\u00e4rf\u00f6r m\u00e5ste sl\u00e4ppa mig fri fr\u00e5n, f\u00f6r att\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"003","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/003-768x1024.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/003-768x1024.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/003-768x1024.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":14975,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=14975","url_meta":{"origin":31684,"position":4},"title":"Till salu","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2014-09-26","format":false,"excerpt":"Alla \u00e4r d\u00e4r p\u00e5 himlen ikv\u00e4ll. Alla som blivit f\u00f6dda och alla som f\u00f6tts. Varenda en. Varenda myra, lysmask och m\u00e4nniska. Jag tittar upp p\u00e5 stj\u00e4rnhimlen och f\u00f6rundras \u00f6ver det universum jag bor i. Jag minns samtidigt med all tydlighet varf\u00f6r jag bor just h\u00e4r d\u00e4r inte m\u00e5nga lampor st\u00f6r.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"960306-01, 6x9 dia, 01-11 Orion Uppland","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/orion-960306-01.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/orion-960306-01.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/09\/orion-960306-01.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":18299,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=18299","url_meta":{"origin":31684,"position":5},"title":"\u00c4r du lycklig lille v\u00e4n?","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2015-07-21","format":false,"excerpt":"\"\u00c4r du lycklig Hedman?\". 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