{"id":31583,"date":"2019-02-24T17:01:12","date_gmt":"2019-02-24T16:01:12","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=31583"},"modified":"2019-02-24T17:01:19","modified_gmt":"2019-02-24T16:01:19","slug":"lugnt-4","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=31583","title":{"rendered":"Lugnt"},"content":{"rendered":"\n
\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

H\u00e4r \u00e4r det lugnt och stilla. Jag \u00e4r tr\u00f6tt n\u00e4stan j\u00e4mt. M\u00f6jligen utom n\u00e4r man borde sova. Men annars tr\u00f6tt p\u00e5 medicinintag. Tr\u00f6tt p\u00e5 att all mat smakar samma sak. Tr\u00f6tt p\u00e5 att inte kunna g\u00f6ra saker. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

S\u00e5 det \u00e4r mycket soffa. Mycket l\u00e4sande. Mycket film. Lugn. Men just nu n\u00e5gra timmar p\u00e5 l\u00e5tsaskontoret. Milj\u00f6ombyte. Enhandsknappande. V\u00e4nsterhandsknappande. Segknappande. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men \u00e4nd\u00e5. Jag \u00e4r vid gott mod. Dagarna g\u00e5r. Penicillinkuren rullar i tjugo dagar till ungef\u00e4r. M\u00f6jlig ljusning p\u00e5 flera punkter efter den. Hoppas man. Sen d\u00e5 v\u00e4ntan p\u00e5 ny op. tid efter mars. Vet ej om axell\u00e5s plockas bort d\u00e4remellan. Hoppas inte ens p\u00e5 det. S\u00e5 r\u00e4knar med att det blir sv\u00e5rknappat ocks\u00e5 fram\u00f6ver. Men sen hoppas man s\u00e5klart. Suget \u00f6kar ju. Det finns fortfarande massor som jag vill g\u00f6ra.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Det bl\u00e5ser h\u00e5rt p\u00e5 kullen idag. Restvindar fr\u00e5n storm i fj\u00e4llen. Tilltar mot natten. Men vi skall nog st\u00e5 pall. \u00c5tminstone har vi gjort det f\u00f6rr. S\u00e5 varf\u00f6r inte nu?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Kan man inte sova p\u00e5 natten hinner man t\u00e4nka mycket. Mycket gammalt poppar upp d\u00e4r under n\u00e4tterna och allt \u00e4r v\u00e4l inte s\u00e5 roligt. Men det ger i alla fall n\u00e5got att g\u00f6ra. Det \u00e4r som i meditation. N\u00e4r man h\u00e5ller p\u00e5 ett tag dyker det upp saker som man stoppat undan i n\u00e5gon s\u00e4llan bes\u00f6kt vr\u00e5 av minnenas arkiv. Mer och mer frekvent dyker de d\u00e4r minnena upp efter hand. Pockar p\u00e5 att bli genomarbetade. Upplyfta till ytan. Ja och v\u00e4l d\u00e4r blekna bort igen. Avklarade. Genomlysta. Ja de f\u00e5r komma d\u00e4r i natten. Har ju ingen br\u00e5dska. Det \u00e4r en bra tid f\u00f6r det d\u00e4r nu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

L\u00e4ngtar ut s\u00e5klart. Frisk luft. Men os\u00e4kerhet och isiga v\u00e4gar h\u00e5ller mig inst\u00e4ngd. Ja och kl\u00e4dsituationen. Hur f\u00e5r man p\u00e5 sig en jacka eller tjock tr\u00f6ja om man har ett axell\u00e5s? S\u00e5 allt stannar vid att jag tittar l\u00e4ngtansfullt ut genom f\u00f6nster. Det \u00e4r tametusan v\u00e5rv\u00e4der d\u00e4r ute. Man ser knoppar p\u00e5 en del tr\u00e4d. Det \u00e4r dags att s\u00e4tta fr\u00f6n h\u00e4r inne. Det finns en sommar att genomleva inte allt f\u00f6r l\u00e5ngt borta.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jod\u00e5, n\u00e4sta s\u00f6ndag \u00e4r det Vasalopp. Det v\u00e4nder. Hoppet \u00e4r tillbaks. Det kan sn\u00f6a, bl\u00e5sa och vara hur kallt som helst d\u00e4refter. Man vet att nu \u00e4r det bara en tidsfr\u00e5ga. En enkel f\u00e4rdstr\u00e4cka. Nedf\u00f6rsbacke. Mot b\u00e4ttre, enklare tider och liv. S\u00e5 man f\u00e5r v\u00e4l passa p\u00e5 att misstr\u00f6sta den h\u00e4r veckan. Gotta sig i det d\u00e4r nordiska sv\u00e5rmodet som \u00e4r underbart det ocks\u00e5. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Men nu skall jag ge mig h\u00e4r nere. R\u00f6ra mig upp f\u00f6r trapporna. \u00c4gna mig \u00e5t dagens gl\u00e4dje\u00e4mne. Duschandet. Den enda stunden p\u00e5 dygnet utan axell\u00e5set. Br\u00e4ckligt visserligen. F\u00f6rsiktigt. Men underbart och sj\u00e4lvaste friheten i mitt nuvarande liv. Det ni!<\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

H\u00e4r \u00e4r det lugnt och stilla. Jag \u00e4r tr\u00f6tt n\u00e4stan j\u00e4mt. M\u00f6jligen utom n\u00e4r man borde sova. Men annars tr\u00f6tt p\u00e5 medicinintag. Tr\u00f6tt p\u00e5 att all mat smakar samma sak. Tr\u00f6tt p\u00e5 att inte kunna g\u00f6ra saker. S\u00e5 det \u00e4r mycket soffa. Mycket l\u00e4sande. Mycket film. Lugn. Men just nu n\u00e5gra timmar p\u00e5 l\u00e5tsaskontoret. Milj\u00f6ombyte. […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-31583","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":41202,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=41202","url_meta":{"origin":31583,"position":0},"title":"Februaritr\u00f6tt","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2022-02-03","format":false,"excerpt":"Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com Februaritr\u00f6ttheten har tagit mig i ett fast grepp. Jag till och med sitter och sover, n\u00e5ja halvsover, framf\u00f6r datorn idag (igen). Jod\u00e5 det g\u00e5r. Huvudet bak\u00e5t mot stolen. Stolen i uppr\u00e4tt l\u00e4ge. Sen sover man om man \u00e4r tillr\u00e4ckligt tr\u00f6tt. 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Jod\u00e5, jag hittar tillbaka till inspirationen redan p\u00e5 torsdagen. Allts\u00e5 \u00e4r fredagen inget problem i det h\u00e4nseendet. \u00d6ser p\u00e5. En hj\u00e4rna som kokar och som har l\u00e4ngtat mycket efter att f\u00e5 just koka. C p\u00e5 h\u00e4lsocentralen ger mig klartecken f\u00f6r en vecka sim levande till. Vad mer kan man\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/08\/IMG_20190816_101946.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/08\/IMG_20190816_101946.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/08\/IMG_20190816_101946.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":17825,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=17825","url_meta":{"origin":31583,"position":2},"title":"Tisdag – en ny dag","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2015-05-12","format":false,"excerpt":"Man vaknar till en tisdag mitt i v\u00e5ren. Helt OK f\u00f6r min del. Det roligaste som h\u00e4nder idag enligt kalendern \u00e4r soph\u00e4mtning. Momsen har jag n\u00e4mligen redan klarat av. Men en Indisk v\u00e4n i New Dehli har sin f\u00f6rsta br\u00f6llopsdag idag. Hans fru och han sj\u00e4lv \u00e4r b\u00e5da f\u00f6dda p\u00e5\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"vedtr\u00e4-23919189","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/vedtr%C3%A4-23919189.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":17762,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=17762","url_meta":{"origin":31583,"position":3},"title":"Skitdag","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2015-05-04","format":false,"excerpt":"Det regnar ute. Men tre grader varmt. Borde h\u00e5lla sig till regn. Inte sn\u00f6 - nej! Kanske. Vaknar man imorgon s\u00e5 l\u00e4r man f\u00e5 veta. Man f\u00e5r hoppas. Han\/hon\/det\/gud finns inte. Definitivt inte. Skall skicka grejer till USA. Sexton gram \u00f6ver tv\u00e5hundrafemtio gram. En femtiolapp extra. 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Petite, lillkatten, springer entusiastisk med mig ner. Sugen p\u00e5 att komma ner och jobba hon med. Att vara s\u00e4llskapskatt \u00e4r en uppgift hon tar p\u00e5 st\u00f6rsta allvar. Vi kommer ner f\u00f6re \u00e5tta, men det \u00e4r \u00e4nd\u00e5 sent eftersom jag\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"Franz-Kafka","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/Franz-Kafka.jpeg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":12622,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=12622","url_meta":{"origin":31583,"position":5},"title":"L\u00f6rdag avklarad.","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2014-03-29","format":false,"excerpt":"En l\u00f6rdag, jobbardag, bortkastad. I alla fall i princip. 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