{"id":21672,"date":"2016-09-29T07:59:34","date_gmt":"2016-09-29T06:59:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=21672"},"modified":"2016-09-29T07:59:34","modified_gmt":"2016-09-29T06:59:34","slug":"lycklig-men-misslyckad","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=21672","title":{"rendered":"Lycklig men misslyckad"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"failure\"<\/p>\n

Jo fan. Sitter p\u00e5 kontoret igen. Fyra grader ute. K nedskjutsad till sitt. Kaffe upph\u00e4llt i thermocouple mugg fr\u00e5n England. Nitton grader p\u00e5 kontoret. Regn ute. Kodarv\u00e4der. Inte s\u00e5 pj\u00e5kigt.<\/p>\n

F\u00f6r att vara en av v\u00e4rldens mest misslyckade personer, en omv\u00e4nd Midas, s\u00e5 k\u00e4nns det r\u00e4tt bra. Fantastiskt rent utav. Japp fast \u00e4n jag g\u00f6r musik som inte har n\u00e5got v\u00e4rde. F\u00f6r den skall ju ha lyssnare. Japp trotts att jag skriver ord som \u00e4r som s\u00e5pbubblor, poppar och f\u00f6rsvinner in i ingenstans ol\u00e4sta, ja och fast jag g\u00f6r h\u00e5rdvara som folk iof bygger kopior av men inte k\u00f6per, ja och fast jag kodar rad efter rad till ingen nytta. Japp, trotts allt det d\u00e4r. Eller \u00e4r det tack vara? Ja hur som helst s\u00e5 k\u00e4nns det bra. Idag med.\u00a0 Jag l\u00e4ngtar ner hit till kontoret. Vill komma ig\u00e5ng. Tror p\u00e5 det jag g\u00f6r. Vill h\u00e5lla p\u00e5 med det h\u00e4r. Nog \u00e4r det galet allt. Man m\u00e5ste helt enkelt le f\u00f6r sig sj\u00e4lv. Kan man vara en s\u00e5 totalt misslyckad person som jag \u00e4r och \u00e4nd\u00e5 k\u00e4nna sig lycklig? N\u00f6jd med tillvaron?<\/p>\n

Det m\u00e5ste finnas en diagnos…<\/p>\n

Det m\u00e5ste finnas en sjukdom….<\/p>\n

F\u00f6r s\u00e5d\u00e4r skall det inte vara.<\/p>\n

Man borde k\u00e4nna av lidandet. Mer. F\u00f6r inte fan \u00e4r det l\u00e4tt.<\/p>\n

Fast skit samma. Man f\u00e5r allts\u00e5 flina \u00e5t el\u00e4ndet. Ja det kan vara en s\u00e5dan mis\u00e4r att det enda man kan g\u00f6ra \u00e4r att skratta \u00e5t den. G\u00f6ra det hela v\u00e4gen inifr\u00e5n ett hj\u00e4rta som gr\u00e5ter. Ja och sen jobba p\u00e5. Inte t\u00e4nka mer p\u00e5 det. G\u00f6ra sin grej bara. L\u00e5ta “pratarna” prata och prata och prat och prata….<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Jo fan. Sitter p\u00e5 kontoret igen. Fyra grader ute. K nedskjutsad till sitt. Kaffe upph\u00e4llt i thermocouple mugg fr\u00e5n England. Nitton grader p\u00e5 kontoret. Regn ute. Kodarv\u00e4der. Inte s\u00e5 pj\u00e5kigt. F\u00f6r att vara en av v\u00e4rldens mest misslyckade personer, en omv\u00e4nd Midas, s\u00e5 k\u00e4nns det r\u00e4tt bra. Fantastiskt rent utav. Japp fast \u00e4n jag g\u00f6r […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[24],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-21672","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":19191,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=19191","url_meta":{"origin":21672,"position":0},"title":"Upprepningens makt","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2015-12-09","format":false,"excerpt":"Letar strumpor i omakal\u00e5dan eftersom mitt sista par \u00e4r mer h\u00e5l \u00e4n strumpa och kommer p\u00e5 en (bra) plot till en novell. Skall bara f\u00e5 tid att skriva den ocks\u00e5. Just d\u00e4r skulle jag velat ha mer tid. Men har inte och det \u00e4r s\u00e5klart som det \u00e4r med det.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"2015-12-09_09-22-05","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/2015-12-09_09-22-05.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/2015-12-09_09-22-05.png?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/2015-12-09_09-22-05.png?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/2015-12-09_09-22-05.png?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":18195,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=18195","url_meta":{"origin":21672,"position":1},"title":"“Brandmannen” i Bolln\u00e4s och jag h\u00e4lsar i samf\u00f6rst\u00e5nd.","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2015-06-29","format":false,"excerpt":"Guld faller fr\u00e5n himlen ner p\u00e5 mina axlar. Det hj\u00e4lper inte. Gr\u00e4smattan utanf\u00f6r f\u00f6nstret \u00e4r fylld med vita blomblad fr\u00e5n \u00e4ppeltr\u00e4d och k\u00f6rsb\u00e4rstr\u00e4d. Det hj\u00e4lper inte heller. Sommaren \u00e4r \u00e4ntligen h\u00e4r p\u00e5 riktigt. Inte ens det hj\u00e4lper. Det bl\u00e5 har f\u00e5ngat mig, jag vill h\u00f6ra musik i moll, sura lite\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"katt_under_trad","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/katt_under_trad-490x1024.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":15362,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=15362","url_meta":{"origin":21672,"position":2},"title":"Att f\u00f6r\u00e4ndra v\u00e4rlden","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2014-11-20","format":false,"excerpt":"N\u00e4r jag v\u00e4l kommer upp p\u00e5 morgonen, ja just det kan vara en kamp, men en som jag vinner varje dag, s\u00e5 kan jag n\u00e4stan inte h\u00e5lla mig fr\u00e5n att rusa ner p\u00e5 kontoret. Fan, fan, fan, man m\u00e5ste \u00e4ta frukost, duscha, leta kl\u00e4der och det \u00e4r n\u00e4ra att jag\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"url4","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/11\/url4.jpeg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":19406,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=19406","url_meta":{"origin":21672,"position":3},"title":"Liv efter jul","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2016-01-08","format":false,"excerpt":"Det \u00e4r kallt h\u00e4r i Los. S\u00e5klart. Som \u00f6verallt annars. Det \u00e4r vinter. Men tack och lov bor vi d\u00e4r finnar bosatte sig. Japp allts\u00e5 \u00e4r det fem eller tio grader varmare h\u00e4r \u00e4n d\u00e4r nere d\u00e4r floderna fl\u00f6dar. Japp alltid p\u00e5 toppen av ett berg och p\u00e5 r\u00e4tt sida\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"bondkakor","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/12\/bondkakor.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":13976,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=13976","url_meta":{"origin":21672,"position":4},"title":"Jag litar p\u00e5 mig sj\u00e4lv. Det \u00e4r \u00e4nd\u00e5 mer \u00e4n vad de flesta g\u00f6r.","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2014-07-14","format":false,"excerpt":"Regnet \u00f6ser ner n\u00e4r vi tidigt p\u00e5 morgonen \u00e5ker i v\u00e5r r\u00f6da, lite slitna bil ned mot civilisationen. Voxna, Edsbyn, Bolln\u00e4s. Tanka, h\u00e4mta ett bord, fika, k\u00f6pa blommor, handla, hem\u00e5t igen. Vi borde ha k\u00f6pt kol till grillen men det gl\u00f6mmer vi. Vi t\u00e4nkte \u00e5ka in och k\u00f6pa en ost\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Swedish"","block_context":{"text":"Swedish","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=2"},"img":{"alt_text":"St\u00e5ngtj\u00e4rn&sl\u00e4tta 2011 017","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/St%C3%A5ngtj%C3%A4rnsl%C3%A4tta-2011-017-1024x682.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/St%C3%A5ngtj%C3%A4rnsl%C3%A4tta-2011-017-1024x682.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/St%C3%A5ngtj%C3%A4rnsl%C3%A4tta-2011-017-1024x682.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":21167,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=21167","url_meta":{"origin":21672,"position":5},"title":"“Suget”","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2016-08-08","format":false,"excerpt":"Klockan ringer klockan sju igen. H\u00f6stterminen har b\u00f6rjat. Jo man jobbar ju fortfarande p\u00e5 det s\u00e4ttet. H\u00f6sttermin, jullov, v\u00e5rtermin, sommarlov. Projekt str\u00e4cker sig, och anpassar sig ofta \u00f6ver samma perioder, de som man en g\u00e5ng blev formad efter. \u00c5ter fr\u00e5n semester allts\u00e5. Tv\u00e5 underbart sk\u00f6na lediga veckor. Japp verkligen lediga.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"huset","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/huset.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/huset.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/huset.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2016\/07\/huset.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p68PL2-5Dy","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21672","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/24"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=21672"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21672\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21675,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21672\/revisions\/21675"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=21672"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=21672"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=21672"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}