S\u00e5 vaknar jag d\u00e5 igen. L\u00f6rdag natt halv fyra. Vad \u00e4r det som viskar och kallar p\u00e5 mig d\u00e5? Lite f\u00f6rkyld och mosig st\u00e4ller jag mig framf\u00f6r \u00f6sterf\u00f6nstret och ser upp mot berget. Det \u00e4r kolsvart och det bl\u00e5ser h\u00e5rt ute. Inget finns att se f\u00f6r br\u00e4ckliga m\u00e4nnisko\u00f6gon d\u00e4r utanf\u00f6r f\u00f6nstret denna natt. <\/p>\n
Men om jag ville skulle jag kunnat h\u00f6ra den torterades skrik n\u00e4r den sadistiske f\u00f6rh\u00f6rsledaren med upphetsning, n\u00e4ra utl\u00f6sning. just i detta \u00f6gonblick, drar ut en nagel p\u00e5 sitt offer. K\u00e4nna gl\u00e4djen hos en familj som precis just nu f\u00e5tt sitt f\u00f6rsta fullg\u00e5ngna barn efter sex missfall. En dotter. K\u00e4nna v\u00e5ndan hos en nosh\u00f6rning som precis just nu f\u00e5r sitt noshorn avs\u00e5gat. K\u00e4nna den sp\u00e4nda f\u00f6rv\u00e4ntan hos tv\u00e5 som alldeles strax skall \u00e4lska med varandra f\u00f6r f\u00f6rsta g\u00e5ngen. Ta in d\u00f6ds\u00e5ngesten hos femtio precis inf\u00e5ngade tonfiskar. K\u00e4nna gl\u00e4djen och stolthet hos den \u00f6rn som precis nu svingar sig ut \u00f6ver klippans kant och f\u00e5r vind under vingarna. K\u00e4nna skr\u00e4cken hos henne som, med en kniv mot strupen, bl\u00e5slagen och sargad, precis just nu blir brutalt v\u00e5ldtagen av en illaluktande soldat. K\u00e4nna stoltheten och upphetsningen hos henne som just nu i detta \u00f6gonblick kommit p\u00e5 formeln som kommer att f\u00f6r\u00e4ndra allt. K\u00e4nna sorgen hos ett barn som ingen vill ha.<\/p>\n
V\u00e4rlden \u00e4r allts\u00e5 precis som vanligt d\u00e4r utanf\u00f6r f\u00f6nstret, ocks\u00e5 denna natt, s\u00e5 jag g\u00e5r och l\u00e4gger mig igen och s\u00f6ndagssover lugnt som alla andra.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
S\u00e5 vaknar jag d\u00e5 igen. L\u00f6rdag natt halv fyra. Vad \u00e4r det som viskar och kallar p\u00e5 mig d\u00e5? Lite f\u00f6rkyld och mosig st\u00e4ller jag mig framf\u00f6r \u00f6sterf\u00f6nstret och ser upp mot berget. Det \u00e4r kolsvart och det bl\u00e5ser h\u00e5rt ute. Inget finns att se f\u00f6r br\u00e4ckliga m\u00e4nnisko\u00f6gon d\u00e4r utanf\u00f6r f\u00f6nstret denna natt. Men om […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":24,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[24,2],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1702","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-betraktelser","category-swedish"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":39546,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=39546","url_meta":{"origin":1702,"position":0},"title":"Passionen","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2021-08-05","format":false,"excerpt":"Jag lyssnar p\u00e5 Sommar i P1 h\u00e4r p\u00e5 morgonen medans jag tar mig runt i huset med dammsugaren. Malin Broman, konsertm\u00e4stare hos radiosymfonikerna. Violinist av klass. Fast programmet handlar om att hamna r\u00e4tt. Hitta och leva ut passionen. Att veta att man hittat r\u00e4tt. K\u00e4nna det med hela sig. Att\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210724_170617-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210724_170617-scaled.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210724_170617-scaled.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210724_170617-scaled.jpg?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210724_170617-scaled.jpg?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/08\/IMG_20210724_170617-scaled.jpg?resize=1400%2C800&ssl=1 4x"},"classes":[]},{"id":25877,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=25877","url_meta":{"origin":1702,"position":1},"title":"Morgonkaffe","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2017-11-07","format":false,"excerpt":"Det \u00e4r fem grader kallt d\u00e4r ute. K har teater p\u00e5 bes\u00f6k idag fr\u00e5n G\u00e4vle s\u00e5 upp sex \u00e4r det som g\u00e4ller. Men jag \u00e4r redan vaken d\u00e5, s\u00e5 det \u00e4r inga problem att kliva upp. \u00c4nnu en natt med ryckig s\u00f6mn. Jag har legat d\u00e4r och funderat \u00f6ver ingenting\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/IMG_20130828_151005-EFFECTS-768x1024.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/IMG_20130828_151005-EFFECTS-768x1024.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/IMG_20130828_151005-EFFECTS-768x1024.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":15092,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=15092","url_meta":{"origin":1702,"position":2},"title":"En m\u00e5ndagsmorgon att l\u00e4ngta till","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2014-10-13","format":false,"excerpt":"M\u00e5ndag morgon och jag l\u00e4ngtar till kontoret redan n\u00e4r jag \u00e4r upp vid fyratiden i natt. En ynnest att k\u00e4nna s\u00e5. N\u00e5gra miljoner skulle vilja byta med mig och sj\u00e4lv ha den d\u00e4r k\u00e4nslan en m\u00e5ndagsmorgon, men inte ens tv\u00e5 orkar avst\u00e5 en endaste krona f\u00f6r att uppn\u00e5 det d\u00e4r.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"r2pfht98iqs7kypbg4sksmrjwjekpwe","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/08\/r2pfht98iqs7kypbg4sksmrjwjekpwe.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":15192,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=15192","url_meta":{"origin":1702,"position":3},"title":"Varf\u00f6r d\u00e5?","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2014-10-26","format":false,"excerpt":"Det bl\u00e5ser sk\u00f6na h\u00f6stvindar d\u00e4r ute. \u00a0Det friskar i ordentligt till och fr\u00e5n. Hela huset rister och skakar och den l\u00f6sa pl\u00e5ten p\u00e5 taket som hantverkaren inte satte dit ordentligt n\u00e4r han lagade sist skramlar som den alltid har skramlat sedan dess. Flyg av, lossna, far iv\u00e4g med vinden t\u00e4nker\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"regn","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/07\/regn.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":38808,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=38808","url_meta":{"origin":1702,"position":4},"title":"R\u00f6relse","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2021-05-16","format":false,"excerpt":"F\u00f6r 16-\u00e5r sedan (2005) var det tv\u00e5 decimeter sn\u00f6. Japp, H\u00e4r p\u00e5 kullen d\u00e4r jag sitter i samma hus nu som d\u00e5. Just idag. Lite regn \u00e4r allts\u00e5 inget att ojja sig f\u00f6r. N\u00e4'pp. Det \u00e4r inte ens kallt. Eller vitt. Fast man har redan vant sig s\u00e5klart. Vid t-shirtv\u00e4der.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/05\/65453-ANIMATION.gif?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/05\/65453-ANIMATION.gif?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/05\/65453-ANIMATION.gif?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":13287,"url":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?p=13287","url_meta":{"origin":1702,"position":5},"title":"S\u00e5 jag somnar i limousinen","author":"\u00c5ke Hedman","date":"2014-05-29","format":false,"excerpt":"S\u00e5 jag somnar, l\u00e5ter mig falla i s\u00f6mn d\u00e4r uppe p\u00e5 den gr\u00f6na soffan. Alla m\u00e4nniskor, alla bilar, allt som jag normalt inte ser som skogsman f\u00e5r mig att tuppa av helt enkelt. Det och en d\u00e5lig film, eller om det \u00e4r en serier eller vad det nu \u00e4r, d\u00e5ligt\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse"","block_context":{"text":"Betraktelser & Ber\u00e4ttelse","link":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/?cat=24"},"img":{"alt_text":"rosa-limousine-sverige","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/rosa-limousine-sverige.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/rosa-limousine-sverige.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/rosa-limousine-sverige.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.eurosource.se\/akhe\/wordpress\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/05\/rosa-limousine-sverige.jpg?resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p68PL2-rs","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1702","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/24"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1702"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1702\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4558,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1702\/revisions\/4558"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1702"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1702"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.akehedman.se\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1702"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}